Monday 17th March 2014

Am checking in very late, this isn't a good sign...

And I don't have much to say either, really didn't get on-task today at all...but as someone said to me earlier, there's really no point whatsoever in berating myself, THAT DOESN'T HELP!! (How strange, I can't find a caps lock key on this keyboard...)

Anyway, at least the computer is working :).

So, it's been a sort of uneventful day, I was planning on going to the library but then, again, foolishly, thought it was such a pants day and I was already cold and wet from going to my meeting and getting some shopping that I might try and get some reading done at home instead; I mean who needs to be in a library when one can just as easily read at home, with tea? But of course I didn't do any... just drank the tea...

Tomorrow I will be more realistic.

• get up, HP, exercise for ten minutes, walk the dogs
• juice
• get to meeting 12-1.30
• get to CBT session 2-3
• then...go to library...
• meet daughter for cinema 6.30
• go for something to eat after the cinema? (or before...)

And then home and bed.

___________________________________________________________________________
It's an inside job...

I am katia! I can do this.

One thing at a time.

Domestic stuff
-put garbage cans away
-put decorations in attic
-vaccuum c's room
-vaccuum hallway

My stuff
-go grocery shopping
-figure out dinner
-plan for the week
-read for 15 min
-work on Shutterfly book

-Fill out form and mail letter

I want to thank my Higher Power for this program, this website, and my life.

Things I will do today

1. Go to the 6 a.m. telephone ACA meeting

2. Test blood sugar

3. Go to the 6:45 a.m. telephone OA meeting

4. Go to the 7 a.m. telephone DA meeting

5. Go to the 8 a.m. telephone OA meeting

6. Eat breakfast

7. Go to Kroger and get money orders

8. Go to church

9. Eat lunch

10. Go to the business meeting

11. Cook and eat dinner

12. Go to the 7:30 p.m. telephone CLA session

13. Go to the 8 p.m. telephone CLA meeting

14. Go to the 9 p.m. telephone PA meeting

15. Test blood sugar

16. Wash dishes

17. Do my 11th Step inventory for OA

18. Write list for tomorrow

19. Put insullin in me

Thanks for letting me share

Maintenance tasks, do what works for me, think good thoughts someone said “all action is born in thought, life  is reflection of thinking”“Life is a process--just one thing after another. When you lose it, just start again.”R.Carlson

"We reviewed our fears thoroughly. We put them on paper, even though we had no resentment in connection with them. We asked ourselves why we had them. Wasn't it because self-reliance failed us? Self-reliance was good as far as it went, but it didn't go far enough. Some of us once had great self-confidence, but it didn't fully solve the fear problem, or any other. When it made us cocky, it was worse.
Perhaps there is a better way-we think so. For we are now on a different basis of trusting and relying upon God. We trust infinite God rather than our finite selves. We are in the world to play the role He assigns. Just to the extent that we do as we think He would have us, and humbly rely on Him, does He enable us to match calamity with serenity.
We never apologize to anyone for depending upon our Creator. " AA Bog Book, page 68

"The purpose of negativity is usually annihilation.Negative thinking empowers the problem. It takes us out of harmony. Negative energy sabotages and destroys. It has a powerful life of its own.So does positive energy.
Today, God help me let go of negativity. Transform my beliefs and thinking, at the core, from negative to positive. Put me in harmony with the good."From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie

I want to thank my Higher Power for this program, this website, and my life.

Things I have done today

1. Went to the 6 a.m. telephone ACA meeting

2. Went to the 6:45 a.m. telephone OA meeting

3. Went to the 7 a.m. telephone DA meeting

4. Went to the 8 a.m. telephone OA meeting

Things I will do today

1. Test blood sugar

2. Eat breakfast

3. Go to the 10 a.m. face to face Al-Anon meeting

4. Go to the DA workshop at 11:50 a.m.

5. Do numbers

6. Pay bills

7. Clear tables

8. Sweep floor

9. Wash dishes

10. Go through papers

11. Go to the 4 p.m. telephone DA workshop

12. Cook and eat dinner

13. Take shower

14. Get dressed

15. Get some medicine ready for this coming week

16. Go to the 6:45 p.m. telephone OA meeting

17. Go to the 7:45 p.m. face to face NA meeting

18. Go to the face to face NA business meeting

19. Test blood sugar

20. Wash dishes

21. Do my 11th Step inventory for OA

22. Write list for tomorrow

23. Put insullin in me

Thanks for letting me share

I want to thank my Higher Power for this program, this website, and my life.

Things I will do today

1. Go to the 6 a.m. telephone ACA meeting

2. Go to the 6:45 a.m. telephone OA meeting

3. Go to the 7 a.m. telephone DA meeting

4. Get dressed

5. Go to do drug testing

6. Go to group therapy at 9 a.m.

7. Eat breakfast

8. Go to group therapy at 10:45 a.m.

9. Go to see doctor at 1 p.m.

10. Get mail

11. Go to the store

12. Do numbers

13. Go to the 4 p.m. telephone DA meeting

14. Go to the 5 p.m. telephone OA meeting

15. Cook and eat dinner

16. Go to the 8 p.m. telephone CLA meeting

17. Go to the 8 p.m. online EA meeting

18. Go to the 10 p.m. telephone DA meeting

19. Wash dishes

20. Do my 11th Step inventory for OA

21. Write my list for tomorrow

22. Put insullin in me

Thanks for letting me share

Well - odd day off today & lots to do:

- good sleep, healthy bfast, letter to sister, devotion

Now on to the next: 

- arrange removalists
-lunch w aunt at noon

-entry inspection 230

-neat w landlord 1600

Halloween party from 6

-exchange fridge for washing machine

In between: pack boxes:

Lounge, office

Kitchen stuff to move tmr

Linen to move tmr

Washing on line

Transfer rent payment

Pick up mail

Find fake tattoos 

Phew! Time to turn the music up!! 

I want to thank my Higher Power for this program, this website, and my life.

Things I have done today

1. Went to the 6 a.m. telephone ACA meeting

2. Went to the 6:45 a.m. telephone OA meeting

3. Went to the 7 a.m. telephone DA meeting

4. Went to sign a new lease for my apartment

5. Cooked and ate breakfast

6. Gave away some bags

Things I will do today

1. Go to group therapy at 10:45 a.m.

2. Eat lunch

3. Go to Spanish Class at 12:30 p.m.

4. Go to group therapy at 1 p.m.

5. Go to get my drug testing 

6. Renew one of my books

7. Get another book

8. Get mail

9. Do numbers

10. Clear tables

11. Sweep floor

12. Take shower

13. Warm up and eat dinner

14. Go to the 6:45 p.m. telephone OA meeting

15. Go to the 8 p.m. telephone CLA meeting

16. Go to the 9 p.m. online EA meeting

17. Wash dishes

18. Do my 11th Step inventory for OA

19. Write list for tomorrow

20. Put insullin in me

Thanks for letting me share

Maintenance tasks, do what works for me, think good thoughts someone said “all action is born in thought, life  is reflection of thinking”“Life is a process--just one thing after another. When you lose it, just start again.”R.Carlson
fir feeling unraveled, leaving mon and this

messed up my wholemorning. ok start over.rough day ended with cracking phone screen but did not shut down or give up.thx you hp.

Wednesday, October 29, 2014,  From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie
Acceptance
A magical potion is available to us today. That potion is called acceptance.
We are asked to accept many things: ourselves, as we are; our feelings, needs, desires, choices, and current status of being. Other people, as they are. The status of our relationships with them. Problems. Blessings. Financial status. Where we live. Our work, our tasks, our level of performance at these tasks.
Resistance will not move us forward, nor will it eliminate the undesirable. But even our resistance may need to be accepted. Even resistance yields to and is changed by acceptance.
Acceptance is the magic that makes change possible. It is not forever; it is for the present moment.
Acceptance is the magic that makes our present circumstances good. It brings peace and contentment and opens the door to growth, change, and moving forward.
It shines the light of positive energy on all that we have and are. Within the framework of acceptance, we figure out what we need to do to take care of ourselves.
Acceptance empowers the positive and tells God we have surrendered to the Plan. We have mastered today's lesson, and are ready to move on.
Today, I will accept. I will relinquish my need to be in resistance to my environment and myself. I will surrender. I will cultivate contentment and gratitude. I will move forward in joy by accepting where I am today.

(Easier said than done, but will try)

I want to thank my Higher Power for this program, this website, and my life.

Things I did today

1. Went to the 6 a.m. telephone ACA meeting

2. Went to the 6:45 a.m. telephone OA meeting

3. Went to the 7 a.m. telephone DA meeting

4. Ate breakfast

5. Went to group therapy at 9 a.m.

6. Went to individual therapy at 10:40 a.m.

7. Went to the job fair

8. Got mail

9. E-mailed my Vocational Rehabilitation worker

10. Went to the 3 p.m. telephone DA meeting

Things I will do today

1. Do my ACA work

2. Cook and eat dinner

3. Go to the 6 p.m. telephone PRG

4. Go to the 7 p.m. telephone OA meeting

5. Go to the 8 p.m. telephone ACA meeting

6. Go to the 9 p.m. online EA meeting

7. Wash dishes

8. Do my 11th Step inventory for OA

9. Write my list for tomorrow

10. Put insullin in me

Thanks for letting me share

Oh boy, did I screw things up with my health ... my compulsive procrastination screwed me over yet again. I am putting my life in jeopardy, ths is not just "procrastination lite" like most people, this is a real addiction/compulsion and can derail a life as badly as alcoholism does. I should know, already had it happen, and yet again repeating the same pattern. 

Lord, help me today to do what is necessary to live. I will take it half hour by half hour. Or hour by hour. Not more than 1 thing at a time. And not moving on to the next until the first is reasonably completed. 

I've been through health scares before, and it taught me that it's better to go through it then avoid it and let it get worse. So Lord thank you for giving me the courage today to take the next steps to taking care of this situation. Lord help me accept my conditions and see them in a new way. Help me accept life on life's terms knowing you are guiding me through it. Amen. 

___

COMPLETED TASKS: 

✔ Got mail, sorted mail

✔ Called re: status of ck, left message, confirmed it's done

✔ got online UE info

✔ set up healthcare binder

✔Call UE

✔Keep record

--FOR WED--

File claim

Review apps found & apply relevant ones 

Review job kit materials & decide next actions to take

Call doctors

Start laundry

Clean/Dishes

Nails/hair

Mail 2 checks

Devotional/prayer

Walk & stretch (light)

Respons-ible:
respond like you are able
(even if you think you're not).

-- author unknown

Checking in tonight just to be here since I haven't been for 3 days. Had a health scare yesterday which threw me off track but I'm better now and trying to get organized (again) ... it seems I spend an awful lot of time planning, organizing, writing & rewriting task lists and post-its, and I need to start refocusing my energies to the TWO things that really matter right now ... a. Career and b. Doctor appointments. Everything else has to be secondary! Which means bulk of my hours should be on these 2 with less time on the rest.

I'll be back tomorrow to do some pomodoro bursts ...  

I want to thank my Higher Power for this program, this website, and my life.

Things I have done today

1. Went to the 5:45 a.m. telephone ACA meeting

2. Went to the 6:45 a.m. telephone OA meeting

3. Went to the 7 a.m. telephone DA meeting

4. Tested blood sugar

5. Cooked and ate breakfast

6. Went to the 9:45 a.m. telephone CLA session

7. Went to the 12 noon telephone ACA meeting

8. Went to the 1 p.m. telephone CLA session

Things I will do today

1. Go through e-mail

2. Go to the 3 p.m. telephone UA meeting

3. Get mail

4. Take shower

5. Clear tables

6. Sweep floor

7. Cook and eat dinner

8. Go to the 8 p.m. telephone CLA meeting

9. Go to the 9 p.m. online EA meeting

10. Test blood sugar

11. Wash dishes

12. Get my 11th Step inventory for OA

13. Write my list for tomorrow

14. Put insullin in me

Thanks for letting me share

Laundry is easy to do. But I can't seem to get myself to do it. No underwear. Must put it in. Will have time to rest soon after. Dying to go back onto FB to waste time. LAUNDRY IS EASY TO DO! Get dressed! Put in machine! Get dressed!  

Okay, done! Now gotta make the fruit salad.  

people say motivation won't last. neither does bathing, that's why we recommend it daily

zig ziglar

shop

put wash on

wash up

tidy kitchen

ledge

rubbish out

clear desk

tidy living room

---- 6 

tidy bathroom

make bed

hang clothes

tablets/ dressing table

---finish 7 

bath/hair

reward lovely fresh bed after bath 

bed 11.00 

19.44 update all done, will have bath and wash hair at 9 

I want to thank my Higher Power for this program, this website, and my life.

Things I did today

1. Went to the 6 a.m. telephone ACA meeting

2. Went to the 7 a.m. telephone DA meeting

3. Went to the 8 a.m. telephone OA meeting

4. Went to the 9 a.m. telephone DA meeting

Things I will do today

1. Test blood sugar

2. Get medicine ready for the next two weeks

3. Cook and eat breakfast

4. Clear tables

5. Write three questions for tonight's meeting

6. Cook and eat dinner

7. Go to the 7:30 p.m. telephone CLA session

8. Go to the 8 p.m. telephone CLA meeting

9. Go to the 9 p.m. telephone CLA business meeting

Thanks for letting me share

CI  

Email: B 
parents (both)
W 

 50p to cybercafe

Transcribing (this is gonna be a giant confetti smiley!) 

--
The ’3Ts’ aka ’Timed Task Tomorrow’ method - 3 questions before doing something online:
Is it Timed (set a timer)? Is it a Task? If it's a sudden impulse, can I act on it Tomorrow?

50p to cybercafe

Email: W
Parents (both!!)

ACIM

Prep peppers

Reading/notes

Forum 

Transcribing 

Beans

OPTIONAL

Put boosters in phone

Start sorting E

Call re HB 101.98 Jan-March

R notes 

--
The ’3Ts’ aka ’Timed Task Tomorrow’ method - 3 questions before doing something online:
Is it Timed (set a timer)? Is it a Task? If it's a sudden impulse, can I act on it Tomorrow?

Have been in a real slump. Yesterday's email has pushed me into depression. Just showing up for now.

I made it to the library.

I read the reading I needed for my presentation.

I am in the library.

I am trying not to be 'stuck'.

I need to remember my Higher Power and ask for help.

Asking for help... knowing I need to put the action in.

Setting a goal for the next half hour:

find and read an article about the topic I'm presenting on. I want to do this in order to bulk out my theoretical basis for the topic. Just increase my knowledge base in order to increase my confidence in order to nail this nervousness I feel about creating and delivering a presentation!!! It's just nerves. I won't need to feel nervous if I feel like I know what I'm talking about, right? Right. So... off I go...

___________________________________________________________________________
It's an inside job...

I want to thank my Higher Power for this program, this website, and my life.

Things I will do today

1. Go to the 6 a.m. telephone ACA meeting

2. Go to the 6:45 a.m. telephone OA meeting

3. Go to the 7 a.m. telephone DA meeting

4. Test blood sugar

5. Fix and eat breakfast

6. Go to group therapy at 9 a.m.

7. Go to group therapy at 10:45 a.m.

8. Eat breakfast

9. Go to the store

10. Get my prescriptions ready for the next two weeks

- test purge script
- work on img viewer issues
- investigate notes issue
- take 1 req'd class
- generate requested spreadsheet
- 10k steps
- finish novel
- read 30 pp of another book
- clean in bedroom
- tidy office