A New Chapter
My name is Seb, and I am a chronic procrastinator.
My life has been turned upside-down in the last 24 hours, and consequently I find myself posting on this forum.
My life has been desperate for the last few years. I reached a high point where I had everything -- a beautiful girlfriend who I loved deeply, a first-class degree from a premier university, a solid financial footing, a wide network of friends, and a healthy social life. Since reaching that high point, it has been steadily downhill since then.
Now I have none of those things. No partner, no job, bad finances, no friends and a non-existent social life. If ever there was a poster boy for the profound effects of chronic procrastination, then I am your man.
For years I believed it was a form of depression, but that was only a semi-belief. It never quite sat right with me, and underneath the glumness there was still an optimistic outlook, a man with faith and hope and the greatest of intentions.
It was only yesterday that I came across the procrastination entry at Wikipedia. And boy, did it shake me. I read through that page and it MADE me, 100%. I thought that I was a fairly complex fellow, but after reading that page I realised that for the first time in years, I had answers to literally all of my questions.
The first thought, of course, is "if only I had discovered this a few years ago..," but I won't waste any more time on contemplation.
Look. I've been on forums before which mainly act as a crutch for people. I have no idea if this is the same or not...I came straight to the site from the Wiki and liked the cut of the gib. On other forums, there tends to be a consensus which, ultimately, intends to keep you mired in your condition and to take things "ultra slowly".
I intend to start kicking butt immediately. From incompetent thinking to competent thinking. From poor decision-making to good decision-making.
Is this the effect of a placebo? Anything is possible. But it is rare in life to get such an overwhelming epiphany, one that instills euphoria from your fingers to your toes and never seems to dim a notch.
I'm not entirely sure why I signed up to this site to write this message. No doubt there will be some people who will scoff at me, perhaps with the good reference of their own experience, and write me off as a fly-by-nighter. Somebody who will hit the stark reality of their problem by the middle of the second week. And that's fine. I don't mind criticism.
But having read through a few posts, I immediately feel like we are all siblings in this little affair. I'm going to start putting my best foot forward and make the sacrifices for the long-term gain. I do hope there are others out there who will join me in this.
Because honestly? Now I have the best type of laziness: I can't be bothered...to lose any more time. I really can't.
For the first time in five years, I am going to go for a run. It might only be a few hundred yards, but I am going to smile and embrace the pain in a way I haven't for a long, long time.