Saturday 31th August 2013

Abstinence from unplanned time.

• The one thing, the only thing, i can do impulsively is write something on my todo list.
• The one thing, the only thing, i can do off plan is recovery, something to maintain my sobriety, when tempted. I have come to believe that it is more important to maintain sobriety than to get things done.

Abstinence from relying on self. AA Big Book says to rely on God. Quoted in my bookmarks : scroll down to "AA Big Book on fears : relying on God not self-reliance:"

• I have come to believe that it is more important to maintain sobriety of relying on God than to get things done.
  • "15 Points" point 5 says:
    

    5. Develop and rehearse a daily plan of thinking and acting by which you will live that day relying on God, regardless of what may upset you or how hard the old urge to rely on self may hit you.

    My Plan is this:

    1. read "15 Points"
    2. Meditate for 5 min on the attributes of God

:) ci
start timers
:) v task
:) cL
:) time log
:) quiet time
:) r task
:) s task
:) t task
:) 11am pa phone mtg
:-( sort tasks
j task
:-( do tasks
:) put away clothes
:) abstinence day counts
:) reflection
:) pre-plan tmrw

10:53pm:
(Aug 31-22:42) clement: this could be from the NT: 1Ch 16:11 Seek the Lord and the strength he gives! Seek his presence continually!
(Aug 31-22:43) clement: A promise: Psa 18:32 The one true God gives me strength; he removes the obstacles in my way.
(Aug 31-22:44) clement: Psa 28:8 The Lord strengthens his people
(Aug 31-22:46) clement: ps 121
(Aug 31-22:46) clement: I look up toward the hills.

From where does my help come?

121:2 My help comes from the Lord,

the Creator of heaven and earth!

(Aug 31-22:46) clement: 121:7 The Lord will protect you from all harm;

he will protect your life.

121:8 The Lord will protect you in all you do,

now and forevermore.

(Aug 31-22:47) clement: and good ol' ps 23
(Aug 31-22:47) clement: the lord is my shepherd, i shall not want
(Aug 31-22:47) clement: he makes me lie down in green pastures
(Aug 31-22:47) clement: he leads me beside quiet waters
(Aug 31-22:47) clement: he restores my soul
(Aug 31-22:47) clement: he leads me in paths of righteousness for his names strength
(Aug 31-22:47) clement: yea tho i walk thru the value of death, i will fear no evil
(Aug 31-22:48) clement: for thou art with me
(Aug 31-22:48) clement: they rod and thy staff, they comfort me
(Aug 31-22:48) clement: you prepare a table before me in teh presence of my enemies
(Aug 31-22:48) clement: my cup overflows
(Aug 31-22:48) clement: surely goodness and mercy will follow me, all the days of my life
(Aug 31-22:49) clement: and i will dwell in the house of the Lord, FOREVER amen

(Aug 31-22:49) clement: pr 3:5-6
(Aug 31-22:49) clement: trust in the Lord, with all your hearts and lean not on your own understanding
(Aug 31-22:50) clement: acknowledge the Lord in all your ways, and he will make your paths straight
(Aug 31-22:50) clement: amen

• Were we resentful, selfish, dishonest or afraid?
  ---- yes
• Do we owe an apology?
  ---- actually maybe. Lord if you help me to forgive, and give me the power i will. But right now i can't. to upset and angry and resentful.
• Have we kept something to ourselves which should be discussed with another person at once?
• Were we kind and loving toward all?
  ---- no not that one time.
• What could we have done better?
  ---- i was down on myself almost the whole day.
  ---- i never got to any of my MITs
  ---- i never got to my quiet time.
• Were we thinking of ourselves most of the time?
• Or, were we thinking of what we could do for others, of what we could pack into the stream of life?

THINGS I AM GRATEFUL FOR (everything i "did well" comes from god, either thru gifts he's given me or the way he's transformed me)

I did start a new plan with a swim.
I did do the pool.
I did restart several times today.
When i was down on myself it was different. I had a small sense that putting myself down was a condition i suffered from, rather than a true part of "me".
Had a nice movie with wife.

Today I'm moving into my new apartment

I'll get up at 9 and meditate for 30 minutes

Then meet up with peter for breakfast then call M

Try and get in touch with Andre before leaving guesthouse

Get some ben linen, possibly electric blanket

Possibly head to Ms for net and skype call.

Try and stay centered for the day

Text Nick

Step 10, and plan for sunday