Sunday 14th July 2013

Please do not leave advice or feedback.  Thank you.  Prayers welcome. 

During my last trial of this commitment I got to day 77 and then I missed the mark by a 2-4 minutes.   I do not want to be too stringent with my application of the rules, b/c it's about progress not perfection, but at the same time it's important that I do things but a certain time, because when I am on time for my exercise plan, I practice being on time in other areas of my life.  I've started the last continuous set of exercise days on July 12th.  By my watch (which is admittedly ahead), I walked 29 minutes and 43 seconds, but I'm going to give myself some slack, becasue I did not have a written commitment, I have also *counted* the exercise, when I merely satisfied 30 minutes of exercise by the time the gym clock was 12am.  So, I'm still going to count the two days before this one, b/c I want to start somewhere and give myself credit for progress (not perfection).

Excercise can be: an exercise video, walking, swimming, running, jogging, aerobics or fitness class, dance class, yoga, martial arts, biking (stationary or otherwise).

But going forward my commitment is to accomplish 30 minutes of exercise each day before my watch says 12am.  The reasons why I am doing this:

1. I need to have some kind of set time for doing the exercise.  It cannot just be whenever.  Deadlines help me to get things done.  And having a deadline of midnight that is not relative to any old clock helps me to practice the planning required to be on time or early for something.
2. I am practicing being on time in my life for meetings (usually 12-step), appointments (including job interviews), work (when I have a job) and school classes.  I recently felt heartbroken after a job interview process that went haywire, and while I certainly did not deserve most of the scrutiny I received from the hiring manager, my part in that process was that I was not on time.  And I want to be on time for interviews, so that I have enough time to present myself well, and have money to pay back my credit cards and save for school so that I can move out of here.  Being late is a life problem for me.  I have sacrificed a great deal because of it, and I still have done it.  Like an alcoholic walking back into traffic over and over again.  I want to have a successful work assignment, where I don't get fired due to lateness.  Lateness has also affected my social life: I have missed out on movies, group movies, dates, relationships, weddings.  A former boss once said, "___ can't get hirself out of bed to save her own life."  And I am embarrassed about this.  On Saturday (yesterday), I missed a chiropractic appointment entirely because of my sleeping through it.  I don't want to be that person anymore.  Right now I'm scared of getting banned from seeing my doctor.  I feel I need him to get better healthwise. Hence, being on time is very important in my life.  I have a lot of shame surrounding my lateness.  Whenever I'm late, I feel shame, which affects my whole behavior in my life.  It's gotten to the point that, I cannot be a Software Engineer, an actor or really any other profession, unless I fix this.  The number one way I can do this is by fixing my sleep schedule, by doing my dental routine and taking a shower ideally by 12am.  But tonight, I will give myself until 2:30am, to adjust to the schedule.
3. I am interviewing for a job, which requires a lot of sedentary programming work.  Running helps me to feel energized when I am sitting applying to jobs, filling out programming exercises or just plain taking exams.  I believe that sticking to a running plan and the energy I get from exercize will help me in implementing further goals such as applying to grad school or reapplying to university.
4. My goal for this week or until I get a job offer is that I stick to the Rodale running plan, and do at least one module of the running plan per day.  It doesn't matter if I have to repeat training days, just as long as I stay consistent.  It doesn't matter if I have to take a break to use the restroom.  If I do the exercise required, that still counts.  If I skip a walking day, because I have started and stopped this plan several times, making it easy for me to accelerate; that's fine, I can just start the running plan from that place. 
5. This is not a requirement for the commitment, but it's certainly a topline goal: I want to get to the gym on running days so that I can take advantage of the Woodway treadmills.  After all, I've already paid for it.   I would like to be able to take advantage of my gym membership as well as all the excitement and fulfillment that comes from seeing other people and rushing to the gym to be on time, which also helps me fulfill my daily commitment to myself.

******

Walked 30 minutes and 56 seconds.  Ran 1 minute, walked 2 minutes, times 10.  Biked four minutes forward and back.  

I'm sorta zoning out and I need some help re-focusing (just wasted about 45 min), so I'm here.

In the rest of today, I need to:

Process geno results (working on this now)
Check on expts (will do thie soon)
Put in cassettes (will do this soon)
Do c.m. (will do this soon)
Draft emails to MK and CB
Clean kitchen
Clean bathroom
Do laundry
Call IA
Put away groceries
Work for 1 hr on financials
Order shoes
Repair 1 item of clothing

Thanks movingalong - love love love Alice Walker!

• readings
• HIO
• tidy
• cook lunch/dinner
• call d
• email d
• g and pool rehab
• journal
• read 10 articles
• read 10 more articles
• new schedule
• call a
• rest
• HIO 

Feeling good this morning. DH left early to go to a car thing so I have a day to myself. Which is nice and not nice at the same time. I have been the one who's been out and about lately so it's nice to to feel guilty. But on the other had, it would be nice to spend time with DH. But I have a picnic to go to so that will be lovely.

Today I have already: 

• Had breakfast (in the garden - nice )
• put washing on (also de-cluttering as it's some stuff I rescued from mum's house that I wanted to keep so it can be put away (somewhere) now)
• Had a shower 

Today I will: 

• Hang washing (15 mins)
• Wash up (15 mins)
• Empty DW (5 mins)
• Read and reply to R message (15 mins)
• Clean bathroom. :-s (15 mins)
• Budget (30 mins)
• Do 2 x 15 mins decluttering in the living room.
• Cook and pack lunch (mmmm brown rice)
• Leave at 1.15 ish...

Thankyou for uplifting me with your thread starter today, movingalong.

i feel at the moment that life is leading me by the nose and I am leaving unfinished things in may wake - all a bit overwhelming. This happens when I do a reality check rather than the head in hand ignoring what is not immediately in front of me, and so I know that it is healthier to see than to ignore.

it is now nearly 3 and I have an hour's walk ahead to get to where I need to be at 4. It will be evening and possibly quite late evening before I can get back again. So this is a bit of clarification check for what I need to plan for the coming week over and above my usual work:

THESE HAVE DEADLINES THIS WEEK:

P's project: one hour a day for six days. To be complete by Monday week.

Tower business, organise BGM docs with K and HB AGM with J and K; write cover letter for  electrical requirements. Allow two hours

tidy kitchen, living room, backroom and bedroom for T  by Tuesday. Allow an hour and a half

Think about menu and buy food for dinner on Friday 

ring electrician 

MAINTAIN

writing each morning 

prov project

PBT practice

exercises

APPOINTMENNTS

L Mon, ringing Mon, C Wed D Thu, B Thu

MAKE CONTACT WITH

J, AvG, Z, M and R, H and J 

I want to thank my Higher Power for this program, this website, the telephone and online meetings, and my life.

I want to thank movingalong for starting this trend.

Things I will do today

1. Go to the 5:45 a.m. telephone ACA meeting

2. Go to the 6:45 a.m. telephone OA meeting

3. Go to the 7 a.m. telephone DA business meeting

4. Go to the 8 a.m. telephone OA meeting

5. Go to the 9 a.m. telephone DA meeting

6. Go to the 9:45 a.m. telephone CLA activity line

7. Cook and eat breakfast

8. Prayer and meditation morning and evening

9. Take shower

10. Get dressed

11. Go grocery shopping

12. Go to the 1 p.m. telephone CLA activity line

13. Go to the 3:30 p.m. online PA meeting

14. Fix and eat dinner

15. Go to the 5:30 p.m. telephone DA meeting

16. Go to the 7 p.m. face to face NA meeting

17. Go to the telephone PA workshop at 9 p.m.

18. Call my sister

19. Put groceries away

20. Do numbers

Thanks for letting me share