Procrastinators Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from chronic procrastination.

Hello Everyone...

I'm Gerbear and I'm a chronic procrastinator. Procrastinating is something that stops me from being a happy person. I've been procrastinating for as long as I can remember and I've always been able to survive it just in the nick of time. Now that I'm in a level of higher education (I'm in college) procrastination has really affected my grades. I keep telling myself that I'm not going to do this to myself anymore, but the vicious cycle keeps repeating itself. After getting a horrible grade on tests or not finishing a task that I should have finished, I feel alone, scared, and hopeless. I decided to join because if I don't stop now I will never be happy and I feel as though I will never have the future I want to have for myself. I feel as though this habit will hinder me from opportunies for a better future. Thank you for taking the time to read this. I'm actually going to pull an all nighter to study tonight and hope for the best tomorrow. =/ Anyways, I look forward to reading your stories and doing what I can to help.

Gerbear 

how's it going? I hope

how's it going?

I hope your exam turned out ok. good luck with everything, I like your attitude it shows that your ready to do some serious work, and recognize the effort it takes to change.

GL HF

Ice 

Thank you!

My exam didn't turn out ok because of course I was not able to absorb the information fully because of procrastinating. I really want to change. I feel like I have to change. I mentioned the future earlier and I feel now that I have to embrace now. What can I do NOW to change the situation.

hello again

hello again gerbear,

 what can you do now to change you ask?

 my advice personally, well let me give you some history first. Last year was my senior year of undergrad and I was still procrastinating. And I would feel the same as you when I would procrastinate and things would go not as well as I hoped, "depressed, scared, having anxiety etc." So I know how you feel but then I just had enough,I started telling myself no. I got so fed up with the process which was with me since junior high school. And I spent this whole year fixing up my bad habit. I'm in my first year of med school now and about to finish and to be honest with you. I think I'm in a much better place now then last year.  

I don't have empirical advice for you or a program, but this entire website is filled with good resources for that. What I do have though is personal experience. And from my personal experience I qoute the tao te ching, and it says a sick man becomes healed when he is sick of being sick. It sounds to me like you are sick of being sick, that's why I feel like you're on the right path.

From my knowledge the best way to move forward now is to take an inventory of your life and your feelings about procrastination. How does procrastination make you feel? Feel, understand that feeling and its effect on you. Use this as motivation to change. Recognize the way procrastination has caused you discomfort anger anxiety loss then remember its cost. When you know the consequences and keep them at heart then it becomes hard for procrastination to hold its grip on you. Every time I feel like blowing something off I think to the future, I think of how things will turn out this helps me a lot. 

another thing that may help you is to stay small, stay small stay small. Always take things and think of things in small qaunitities. Today you have to study for an exam the exam in it's entirety may seem unbearable. But to take on a few chapters, 1 chapter at a time with breaks, and laughing and rewards and meditation or whatever is much more doable. Once again I qoute the the Tao Te Ching, "the true master never attempts to accomplish big things, instead he takes on many small steps and thus achieves greatness."

GL HF (good luck have fun) I include have fun in there because why shouldn't your jounrey to improve be fun. It doesn't have to be a chore it could be an awesome adventure of improvement and challenge

The Ice Guy 

Thank you so much!!

Thank you! I haven't posted in a while because I've been busy with school. This week was a great week for me because I took my chem exam and actually finished and felt confident in my work. I agree with what you said about taking things in small quantities. I study in small chucks  througout the week in order to absorb or at least familiarize myself with the material. The thing is with me and thinking about the future is that it freaks me out. I'm scared that I might not achieve what I want to or that the picture of what my ideal future would be will never come to life. My procrastination will get in the way of that and I can't help but feel as though the future is written in stone although I know it's not.

hi again Gerbear, the

hi again Gerbear,

the future can be overwhelming can't it especially when you have a very specific idea of what you need to accomplish in order for it to work out the way which is as you mentioned "ideal."

My best personal advice (what I have learned over the years) on this Gerbear is to have goals but not too get too specific or concerned with all the little details. In undergrad and highschool I was kind of obsessed with becoming a neurosurgeon. I studied super hard,even though most of the studying was last second procrastination ,and pushed my self to the limits scored high in classes etc. I wanted to go to Stanford for medical school and be soooo cool buy a nice car live in an awesome area. I had this ideal image of my future. And it kept me going. The sad thing though was I wasn't happy, in fact I was just constantly chasing a dream. I wasn't really living.

truth is I didn't score as high on my MCAT as I needed for an IVY league medical school and suddenly my dreams of awesome sandy californian beaches faded away. But, by the time I was  a sophmore in college I started changing I didn't care anymore in fact I ended up going to another less prestigous but still awesome medical school. And the experiences I've had and people I've met, has been humbling and I've met an awesome girl I love. I don't even want to be a neurosurgeon anymore because then I wouldn't have as much time as I wanted to take care of a family! All my dreams etc changed and I don't even care I'm still happy. In fact, I'm really greatful. And it's not just me I've heard so many stories like this from other people. 

The thing is there is just way too many variables in life, it's hard if not painstaking to follow one plan you have made years ago. You know because not only are you going to meet new people, see new things, you yourself change and what you want now may not be what you want later. 

So I say dream big but don't kill yourself with the details and don't worry about having to accomplish all your goals perfectly. As long as you have a direction and you're trying doing your best putting effort chances are you're gonna end up somewhere good. 

GL HF 

 

Thank you so much

Thank you so much icemountainguy. I just came back from a test that I probably didn't do so well on. Every time I fail I feel alone and hopeless and that my chances of succeeding are fading away. At the end of the day, I just want to know for sure that no matter what everythings going to be ok. I have no idea where my life is heading and it's scary. I feel like the more I fail the chances of me moving up in life are eliminated. I truly want to live life not struggle to survive.

hi gerbear91!

in your OP you said:

> if I don't stop now I will never be happy and I feel as though I will never have the future I want to have for myself. I feel as though this habit will hinder me from opportunies for a better future

that's probably true. Or at least that has been the experience of a lot of people on this forum.

This fellowship of people on this site is now filled with people who are recovering. Welcome.

You asked what you can do "NOW". I know exactly what that feels like. I have felt it many times. For me, i never did find out how to fix myself.

What i mean was there was no "one thing" that i could do--book i could read, idea i could learn, technique i could start doing--to fix myself.

Instead, i had to think of my problem a an incurable disease that i would have to manage my whole life. More like diabetes than appendicitis.

And then i had to start a daily habit of managing it.

In fact, i am having a good day today. I dont "need" this site today. But it is part of my new habit to come here, and remember who and what i am. This will lessen the frequency and duration of my procrastination binges. It just keeps me generally healthy.

The two main things here are the daily checkin on the top-ish right and the "chatbox" in one of the tabs near the top.

Join us in our mutual struggle for recovery!

the touch of the master's hand: http://procrastinators-anonymous.org/node/1898#comment-27748

fall down seven times, get up eight - japanese proverb

bookmarks

Now that's a great insight

Instead, i had to think of my problem a an incurable disease that i would have to manage my whole life. More like diabetes than appendicitis.

Thank you for that insight - it has really struck home to me this morning.

I think it might also apply to my newly diagnosed depression

H.

Thank you for the reply!

Thank you so much. I will explore the site more often and become more involved. I agree that it's not a "curable" thing. Like you said, it is an on going battle. 

welcome Gerbear,  You

welcome Gerbear,

 You can use the tools available here. Chat box is the one which is more useful for me. 

thank you!

Thank you so much!! It's going to take time for me to get used to this site, but I'm loving it more and more each time I log in. It's going to take a great amount of work for me to improve myself, but with a great support site like this I will be able to accomplish my goal.

Welcome gerbear!

"Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter.  Try again.  Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett

thank you!!

Thank you for the great quote and for the welcoming gesture!

@gerbear

Here's a great intro that workinprogress wrote up for us.

http://procrastinators-anonymous.org/node/3976#comment-52052

"Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter.  Try again.  Fail again. Fail better." - Samuel Beckett