Procrastinators Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from chronic procrastination.

Friday 3rd November 2006

pro's CI - 6:45pm

I went up to NYC AA Intergroup for the answering phones orientation, and ended up working a shift. It was a good thing to do. Most people were just looking for meetings, but I had a couple conversations with newcomers where I felt I was able to help in a more substantial way. Also, it was very good for me to get out of my apartment and be around people for a few hours. I'll be doing it again on Sunday afternoon, and again next Friday afternoon.

Now the question is, was that procrastination? :? I had a long to-do list today, and blew off most of it. In particular, I still have that back accounting and the problem of making a living.

making a living

Hi Pro,

Felicitation to have started volunteering! It is a very
good way to break the loneliness. I see that you also enjoy it!
Have you considered getting a professional bookkeeper ? It is some money out, but can be some very well spent money.

Being a freelancer is very very hard: financial instability and money issues, loneliness, work not always interesting, ... seing one's peers 'getting ahead' in their careers with financial stability, ... However, one gains a lot of skills by the shear harshness of the situation and can make some very good money when times are very good.
You also have my whole admiration for being a freelancer. :smile:


I don't want to hire a bookkeeper for something I could very easily do for myself. In fact, the time it would take to train a bookkeeper would probably be more than what it would take me to simply do it, and it would be done better if I were doing.

I want to get outside for a while today because the weather is nice, but later I hope to get some back accounting done. Tomorrow afternoon I'm volunteering to answer phones again.

Housereclaimer 1st checkin

Just goofing off again
didn't do the quick books stuff yesterday so maybe I will do it tonight.

I am going to take you up on your offer and start a gratitude thread in the questions section. Every day I will say 5 things I am grateful for feel free to join in.

anyone else game feel free


good idea!

That will definitely be good for me! I'll add my five things for today.

iwant2workharder - CI 22:48

Now time to leave the office.

I wish you all a very good night sleep:

- part1 website1 - 3 files left
- part2 website1
- part3 website1
- part4 website1
- part5 website1
- part6 website1

iwant2workharder - CI 21:11

I am now dealing with ONE file from website1 part1.

- open file
- go through it
- consider the 6 changes.

To Do
- part1 website1 : 10 files

- part1 website1: 10 last files
- part2 website1
- part3 website1
- part4 website1
- part5 website1
- part6 website1

pro's CI - 12:40pm

My landlord has been providing adequate heat the last few days. There's a novelty.

I'm going to go out now - do various errands.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Ta Da~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

  • Make and eat breakfast.
  • Check email.
  • Look into temping.
  • Register with an agency that handles freelance Web dev work.
  • Shower and dress.
  • Water and FEED plants (feeling is long overdue).
  • Make bed (convert futon back into a couch).
  • Lay out pills for the day.
  • Take pills (dose 1 of 3).
  • Put in contacts.
  • Wash breakfast dishes.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~To Do~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

  • Go uptown for phone answering orientation (I'm volunteering). Actually, maybe I'll do that now instead of this evening).
  • Get mail.
  • Buy groceries.
  • Handle pile (make it go away).
  • Other stuff (TBD).

iwant2workharder - CI 18:12

The file system is working in a strange way.

Ta Da
- part1 website1: reduced to 10 files left

To Do
- part1 website1 : 10 files
- part2 website1
- part3 website1
- part4 website1
- part5 website1
- part6 website1

pro's CI - 12 noon

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Ta Da~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

  • Make and eat breakfast.
  • Check email.
  • Look into temping.
  • Register with an agency that handles freelance Web dev work.
  • Shower and dress.
  • Water and FEED plants (feeling is long overdue).

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~To Do~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

  • Make bed (convert futon back into a couch).
  • Put in contact.
  • Wash breakfast dishes.
  • Get mail.
  • Buy groceries.
  • Handle pile (make it go away).
  • Other stuff (TBD).
  • Go uptown for phone answering orientation (I'm volunteering). Actually, maybe I'll do that now instead of this evening).

Gwen D 7:35 AM

Pro. I really relate to the lingering, languishing morning habit. It's so fun!! I like feeling like it's a holiday, or I'm on vacation. I seem to have internalized those values. But, I now have to get out of the house to this job (one hour commute away) and, even with daylight savings time on my side, I can't get there before 9am. I just refuse.

I don't want to look a gift horse in the mouth, but after 5 years of being freelance, I really am feeling the affects of having to tow the line. For seven months now, I guess. It just doesn't let up. Freelance, and falsely leisurely mornings are looking really good right now.

It might be wrong for me to complain, but I've been acting grateful on every other front, and I need to vent about the dark side of getting what you ask for. My job is a doozey. I thought that it was going to be perfect for me when I signed on. I thought I was going to have a manager, and she promised she'd time manage and chose tasks for me to do. Then she left for another job and left me there. That was okay, because I then only had one big task, and it was clear, and other people were involved. But then I did that. And they loved what I did so much, they put me in the manager's slot.

So now, I'm alone in the room. I have no manager whatsoever. I hardly know the bureaucratic system I have to function in. There are many, many tasks to choose from. And those are just the ones I can see. I've got to hire someone, and that task feels impossible. It seems I spend my week making lists of things to do, and only jumping in and doing the ones I can manage quickly on my own. The more involved projects get put on the back burner. I go in and out of feeling capable and being completely in avoidance.

Okay. It's not really so bad. (I have to keep remembering what self-employed tax time was like when I had no savings. I have to imagine this difficulty is being solved entirely for me now. I have a hard time with abstract concepts like that). But, this does challenge me, physically, mentally, spiritually.

Off to it, now. I'll be 40 min late today. (Though I always stay late and no one cares about the time).

Oh! My friend just called (halleluja) and is going to come help me focus on the resumes! That's amazing. Anyway. I wanted to check in with you all. Cause this job, despite the fabulousness, is playing right into my procrastinator tendencies. It's yelling at me to change. And I seem to need support in that change.

Thanks everyone for the forum!!!!!!!!!!

Gnothi Seauton ~ Know Thyself

doing the work one likes

Gwen : seems you really do not like your job. Any idea if it would be
difficult to find another one?

Pro: I have just booked myself to one of the free web programming courses!!! I am soooo excited about it. Thank you for talking about it. I am also now joining the 4 IT guys technical meetings as I feel like moving into the programing side of web rather than the translation side ( too many legal words to check).

sounds good!

I hope you enjoy your class. I'm totally self-taught with the Web programming stuff. I just liked it and took to it. (I was a DOS and Windows programmer before that.)

I don't know why I'm so resistant to using this skill to support myself. Mostly I've just created my own Web sites, but some involved very extensive programming so I learned a lot and I'm a very strong programmer now. I found a freelance programming job on Craig's List once and enjoyed doing that. Maybe I should stop resisting so much. It does pay well.

These free courses on Web programming

Yes Pro, It is really good that there are these courses on Web programming. I am really looking forward to. I am not so much of an autodidact: I prefer learning in a classroom.

I'll have to go to the library to see what books are there, so that I get a wea bit of knowledge before the course. realise I 'll need to call up my brother who is a software engineer for advice.

Nice to do some call answering: is it like the samaritans?

freelance freedom

>I don't want to look a gift horse in the mouth, but after 5 years of being freelance, I really am feeling the affects of having to tow the line.

I dread that - just don't feel I could handle it (or would want to). That's why I only look for freelance work. Yes, there's a downside to being freelance, but having to be someplace five days a week... I don't want to do it!

In my last so-called freelance job, I was technically freelance but not really. In the beginning I thought I had the best of both worlds, but in the end I started to think I had the worst. I was a full-time freelancer - basically a full-time employee with no benefits. Pros: Secure pay, can work from home and set my own hours. Cons: No vacations ever, no benefits.

Now I'm truly freelance - getting work is part of my job (and not a part I've been doing a lot of lately because I've been so down). I took two actions today, though, and I feel pretty good about that.

re: freelance freedom

Kudos on taking action on getting work. Did it help you feel less down? It's interesting what you're saying about dreading towing the line. I think I luxuriated in freelance work--I had some nice clients and got paid well when they needed me--but it was really out of balance, because unlike my workaholic friend who is generally really inspired to build his career and is making amazing progress, I just wasn't strong enough, confidence-wise, to sustain the effort. I'd excel at something that fell in my lap, but I was really not suited to freelance. I say that because I was struggling with debt and the anxiety about where my next job would come from was sometimes debilitating.

That said, I really respect folks who are making it happen for themselves. A lot. It's hard.

My job is hard in it's own way (I expressed that this morning), but as much as I've been complaining, I think I really have it made. I'm sort of like a freelancer here, only with a big budget and a regular paycheck, and soon I'll have someone to work for me. I only just thought of it that way!!!! But I'm sitting here in my office and I feel a ton better because I'm finally getting my head around my projects on my plate. And it's Friday.

Anyway --- my panic is lessened and I think being able to vent this morning, then come in and grounded enough to make progress really helped. Hanging in there.

pro's CI - 11:10am

I found an employment agency that specializes in an area that suits me perfectly. Perhaps this will lead somewhere. They probably don't pay great, but Web programming has to pay more than clerical work.

The problem is, I'm still not dressed. I need to finish my morning routine!

pro's first check-in - 10am

I went to sleep at a reasonable hour last night - lights out by midnight. Consequently, I was up at 8am, wonder of wonders.

However, I'm back to my old habit of starting to work when I'm done eating breakfast but still in my jammies with the bed unmade, etc. If I like doing that so much, I should only have breakfast after doing everything else. That was my father's habit. He'd have breakfast the last thing before leaving for work.

I just emailed my client about the work I have due (but didn't do). Doing it would have been better, but at least I'm not hiding.

I want to call a temp agency today - see what's available through that channel. I want to do something very low responsibility and low commitment. Temping fits the bill. I did temp work in grad school and I enjoyed it. Going into different companies for a few days is fun. You get to see how lots of different companies work. My overhead is low now - I don't need to make that much money. (Of course, if I'd catch up on my accounting then I'd know exactly how much money I really do need to live - currently a mystery.)


I contacted a temp agency, and found out they pay only about $10/hour. 25 years ago when I was doing temp work I made $7-8/hour. How can they be paying so little 25 years later??

I'd work for $20/hour, but I just can't see $10/hour. So much for that idea. I might try other agencies, or maybe not - they probably all pay the same.

iwant2workharder - CI 12:54-59

So I have started website1 at last!
Now I am realising that I really procrastinated going into
the hardest as I feared I couldn't do it????!!!! or that
I didn't really know how to do it or what to do exactly ????!!! Or simply I didn't really see what was really involved as I had to
decompose some of the steps again... and now though the work is long,
I can see what is involved and the different steps.

The paper method seems to be working...

Ta Da
- started website1

To Do
- part1 of website1
- part2 of website1
- part3 of website1
- part4 of website1
- part5 of website1
- part6 of website1

iwant2workharder-CI 09:36

Good morning to you all.

Couldn't work for 2 days as the computer security
guy was dealing with security problems coming from
the internet.

Checking my own work sheets, I realise it takes a
lot of time to actually check-in on the forum - 20 minutes just for this posting!.
I am now trying paper method as check-in and a small program
I asked to be made is now being programmed as
I fear the IT guy might set up something to make it
hard for browsing the web from our machines ( security issues
they always say)...

I'll let you know how it goes. I am testing the paper
method on website1 and hopefully on the new software

To Do
- Big Part1 - website1
- Big Part2 - website1
- Big Part3 - website1
- Big Part4 - website1
- Big Part5 - website1
- Big Part6 - website1