Substance over Form
I'm learning that for a variety of reasons, I've spent much of my life
focusing on form rather than substance. My focus has been on having my
hair done perfectly, wearing the right clothes, having my makeup applied
perfectly, living in the right place, furnishing it with the right
furniture, working at the right job, and having the right man. Form,
rather than substance, has controlled my behavior in many areas of my
life. Now, I'm finally getting to the truth. It's substance that counts.
There is nothing wrong in wanting to look our best. Whether we are striving
to create a self, a relationship, or a life, we need to have some solid
ideas about what we want that to look like.
Form gives us a place to begin. But for many of us, form has been a
substitute for substance. We may have focused on form to compensate for
feeling afraid or feeling inferior. We may have focused on form because
we didn't know how to focus on substance.
Form is the outline; substance is what fills it in. We fill in the outline
of ourselves by being authentic; we fill in the outline of our life by
showing up for life and participating to the best of our ability.
Now, in recovery, we're learning to pay attention to how things work and feel, not just to what they look like.
Today, I will focus on substance in my life. I will fill in the lines of
myself with a real person - me. I will concentrate on the substance of
my relationships, rather than what they look like. I will focus on the
real working of my life, instead of the trappings.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie
MY BASICS: checking in; support calls(1x); affirmations; gratitudes; reading; check calendar AM; check calendar PM; write down my 6 most important tasks; voicemail; exercise; manage A; manage D; use "tracking time" sheet; use master list; use timer
Affirmations (said aloud as well):
I choose to show up and start my top 6 tasks, 15 to 30 minutes at a time.
I set my mind to my top 6 tasks and I complete them -- in 15 to 30 minute periods.
It is a quiet Friday, and both of my bosses have been away all week, so all work is caught up. We are getting off at 3:00 as well due to their absence. Friday is usually an evening out with our friends for beers and a bite to eat, but we are on our own tonight, so I think we'll have a "date night" instead :-)
No list for today! I'm giving myself the day off.
Hey, I forgot to check in this morning!
I got to the gym at 6:41 this morning, that's a four minute improvement! I was late to work again but only by a couple of minutes. This has been a messed up week all around, so I'm going to make it through today and then try to do much better next week. I've been quite distracted this morning and have not gotten much work done besides email and plannning activities. My major project is 'stuck' pending getting an answer from a vendor, so I'm feeling frustrated and out of sorts about that. I have plenty of other work to do, one important thing and several things of lesser importance but I definitely don't need to waste time while waiting for that answer. I'm gonna see if I can knock out several small tasks over the next hour then try to get the important task completed before the end of the work day.
It's looking to be a beautiful weekend and I'm not working this weekend either!
Self-improvement is the name of the game, and your primary objective is to strengthen yourself, not to destroy an opponent. Maxwell Maltz
Had a fabulous time :)
Connor has his well visit today so not too much on the list but I really want to commit to getting this sheet music today.
Things to do today-
Vitamins & #1 #2 #3 #4
#1 #2 #3 #4 #5 #6 #7 #8
-Purchase sheet music
-Print it off
-Finalize plans for tonite
-Prep for christening
A quasi-vacation week rolls to an end, and I'm slightly disorganized and distracted. I've been in a relatively good place as far as avoiding procrastination for the last couple of months or more, and this week I'm hitting a disturbance. I'm trying to minimize the effect and hope it doesn't continue next week. Meanwhile...
I want to thank my Higher Power for this program, this website, the telephone and online meetings, and my life.
I want to thank fudo shin for starting this trend.
Things I have done today
1. Went to the 7 a.m. telephone DA meeting
2. Went to the 8:30 a.m. telephone CLA meeting
3. Went to the 9:45 a.m. telephone CLA meeting
Things I will do today
1. Cook and eat brunch
2. Prayer and meditation morning and evening
3. Send out Al-Anon literature for today
4. Get medicine ready for the next two weeks
5. Take shower
6. Do numbers
7. Get dressed
8. Go to the state place and give my award letter
9. Go to the Internship at 1:30 p.m.
10. Go to the bus station and purchase a monthly pass
11. Call the hotel and ask if they transport people to and from the Greyhound station.
12. Make bed
13. Wash dishes
14. Print out material that I need
15. Declutter apartment for 15 minutes
16. Go to work at 5:30 p.m.
17. Go to the 10 p.m. telephone DA meeting
18. Test my blood sugar twice
19. Pay my storage unit
Thanks for letting me share
1000 word study deadline - Midnight tonight
Words so far : 500 I have sent it off, had enough now feel tearful and stuff at least I will get some marks
Time : 16:25 pm
OK, actually managed to get up more or less on time today, have had a healthy breakfast, and prayed about my day.
Today is a busy day!
My main task for the morning is to prep for mtg w/ my adviser. That means:
Looking at 3 slides
Ask L and J about cells (L is out of town)
Write up agenda
Then, at noon I have lunch with a (former) friend that I argued with...I want to do my best to reconcile. (this went well, praise god!)
Meeting is at two, after mtg I'll take notes, start genotyping, check on expts and start deacon stuff. (Meeting went well!)
Show up (done)
Basics, pray for divine timing Have a great day.
Please do not leave advice or feedback. Thank you. Prayers welcome.
This is the 60th day that I have followed through with the following:
I'm making a pledge to quit using the dating site(s) and Facebook for 90
days. I had written this on my 43things account, but I wrote that I
wanted to avoid dating sites for a full six months, so I think 90 days
is reasonable for a dating site. I also have a penchant for looking at
and stalking certain people repeatedly on the dating website and online,
which has prevented me from sanity. Just all out stalking certain
people has been all out crazy; if I'm not stalking one person, it's
another person. During times I've tried to quit the dating site
before, I have visited people's dating profiles, even while not
registered on the dating site. So part of my whole thing with quitting
dating sites is also quitting stalking people's profiles that I've tried
to date in the past. If I accidentally load a dating site, b/c I
accidentally clicked on something obviously that doesn't count. You can
hardly hang a cat on the Internet without hitting a dating site ad.
Intention is everything.
In other words:
Web Sites and Techniques