Procrastinators Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from chronic procrastination.

Monday August 10

 The PROMISES

"We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not forget the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and out-look upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves".

 

Recycler CI 4:25pm EST

Hi Pro Buddies!

This morning at the gym I did my full cardio, stretching, and ab exercises.

At the office this morning, I checked my email, and processed new, incoming projects before lunch. At lunchtime, I ate food I had brought from home, did a telephone errand, updated my spending record, and went into a quiet room for a few minutes meditation. This afternoon I kept working down my project list. Since it is toward the end of my work day now, I have updated my assignment list for tomorrow.

Next: after work, drive to chiropractor appt. Do an errand before or after appt, then go to meeting of my other 12-step program tonight. After meeting, go with my sponsor for a soft drink and talk about some stuff from this week. I probably won't get home in time to update my CI.

Have a great night, everyone! :)

Recycler


Recycler

Thank you, gals & guys, for being here! :)

12 Step Workbook

I've been reading this workbook during my quiet time lately and this paragraph really resonated with me today:

THE DRUG: GUILT AND PUNISHMENT

The drug of choice for so many otherwise loving, good people is guilt and punishment. It is suggested that we set aside all guilt and punishment for others and ourselves. Guilt and punishment is much like alcohol and other drugs. They give us the illusion that we have done something about the problem; however, we may have a temporary fix at best when in truth nothing has changed at the root of our problems, our personal "reality."

We will repeat the same problems until there is real healing. We are asked to seek correction not guilt and punishment. Remember this; we cannot have an open mind or a new or higher understanding when we are judging.

The workbook can be found at:

http://www.12stepworkbook.org/ 

"The elevator to success is out of order.   You'll have to take the stairs . . . one step at a time." - Joe Girard

I like that one!

Thank you for poisting it!

 

Do I t Now

 

Porcess not perfectoin 

what a great insight -- thanks for posting!

Hi Journey!

That is a really great insight! Thanks for posting! :)

Recycler


Recycler

Thank you, gals & guys, for being here! :)

A Serendipity Journey

Thank you. My HP's "message" to me. I often talk of my "serendipity " so it truely a message for me.

ScottK CI 10:41

Things I'd like to get accomplished today:

1) Contact NF
2) Submit meditation
3) Put GD article up
4) Post minutes
5) Write one Textbroker assignment
6) Write another Textbroker assignment
7) Apply for freelance work
8) Drop note to JF

 

CL ci

after vacation is always hard 4 me.

already worked out :) and surfed :(

11:30 for monday after vacation, this is not that bad
11:30 fiddling 15 min
11:45 online distraction 50 min
12:35 check work email for emergencies / urgent done @ 2:17, 45 min over :( restarting
2:15 quiet time
2:45 process week's worth of email, but dont be compulsive abt it. most if not all can wait til scheduled time to respond. God give me strength.
3:30 start working - in progress -- need courage to face the next task.

got some things done, for which i'm grateful. hopefully more tomorrow.

----------
the touch of the master's hand: http://procrastinators-anonymous.org/node/1898#comment-27748

"fall down seven times, get up eight" - japanese proverb

kromer 10:30 CI

Morning, all!

This morning I've had prayer time, returned coolers, am now in lab.

Today I need to: (MITs)
*Send email to friend about upsetting situation
*Do motif comparisons
*Work on G's project
*Email MG, L, and DG
*Finish proposal
*Email Re: raffle tickets

Other tasks:
*Email Kevin 2x
*Buy book of confessions
*Laundry
*Get alt. GSEA running.

I'm going to start w/ email, then motif comparisons. 

Update 11:10--email sent. Now it's time to work on motif comparisons for a bit, then I'll have lunch. Heading to the chatbox to work on comparisons. 

kromer 7:45

OK, I finished motif comparions, sent emails to MG, L, and DG, bought book of confessions, sent email to friend about upsetting situation and made plans to talk about ti tonight. Not a fantastically productive day, but for a day when every step was a struggle it's not bad.

For this evening, I'm going to go to my square dance class. Need to have conversation with friend...sort of dreading it, but it needs to happen. If that's all that happens tonight, that's totally okay.

I'm going to break down one more task (starting bg runs)...don't expect to get it done tonight, but it'll give me something to do if I can't sleep after stressful conversation, and in any case I want to be able to get started on it right away tomorrow morning. 

Starting bg runs:
1)Get seqs matching in N content (+-20% on seq len, w/in 2fold #ns)
2)Download additional random seqs if necessary
3)Compute new markov bg
4)start 2 test bg runs
5)Start 100 real bg runs

OK, heading to square dancing now. Will CI after conversation w/ friend (and maybe before, if I'm tempted to be a wimp and skip it :P ). 

Thank you all for being here, I couldn't do it without you guys!

kromer 1 CI

Having a hard time working today. I'm working on motif comparison. Here's a detailed breakdown of what I need to do:
1)Track down 5 transfac motifs manually
2)Format JASPAR motifs
3)Transfer formatted motifs to server
4)Run comparison code
5)Look at results and email to G

OK, back when I'm done w/ each step. I'll use a timer and the chatbox to get through this. 

Update 2:50: Code is running. While it runs, I decided that I'd choose a next task and break it down. Next task is emails. I've already sent the email to L, so I'll work on the email to M.  To do this, I need to
1)Proofread my and TE's sections (working on this now)
2)Add info about retinol toxicity
3)Compose email
4)Send email

Once I'm done w/ the email to M, I need to do the email to DG. For this,babysteps are:
1)Find email where he offered to send me data
2)1 or 2 sentences on what I'm working on
3)1 or 2 sentences on what data would be useful and why
4)Thanks
5)send

 

ci 8.10.09 babarino

THX for being here everyone!I loved the suggested promises posted yesterday. Feel in danger of getting overwhelmed so going to post list here:

Send sub(done)

Email(done)

Calculate d

Organize d & Read file

conf

Look at emails for u project

Call hotel(done)

Rental car? (done)

Res for next week (done) 

Calendar(done)

Call l and f(done)

Prep for meeting tomorrow

Call 2 W's & schedule

Vic 8/10

The desire for avoidance shall disappear. We shall face the present and the future with steadfast hope.

Yesterday’s promise saved me. All the promises say “we”. As hopeless as I feel right now, I know there is hope in the rooms, maybe evewn for me. I am grateful that I did not shut down yesterday, it would be that much harder today. So today, showing up, got dressed, took son to work, cleaned. Did not call resort yesterday, will call today and find out my options.

you are not alone

(((hugs to vic and all)))

Recycler


Recycler

Thank you, gals & guys, for being here! :)

praying 4 u

there is hope indeed. u had strength come to u yesterday for which i rejoice.

----------
the touch of the master's hand: http://procrastinators-anonymous.org/node/1898#comment-27748

"fall down seven times, get up eight" - japanese proverb

Reality

Thank you for pointing out the truth and prayer. It is ONLY by his grace I received strength not to shut down or pick up,but instead "show up" , it was not "I" nor will it ever be "I" . I only need to enlarge my spiritual awareness for new beliefs.I love the following:

Changes and new conditions are the inevitable result of living life, on life's terms. (pg 85). The idea that what is now known is enough to deal with any new situation is an egotistically attractive but "erroneous false. belief in personal omniscience". That "all knowing" quality generally gets reserved for an idea of "God". (pg 55). Old ideas may not always apply to new and different conditions. (pg 58). The desire to enlarge awareness of "the Great Reality" (i.e.: "God" - pg 55) is a personal desire for more "spiritual growth". (pg 60).New ideas are an essential ingredient in making intelligent choices under changing conditions. Unintelligent emotional decisions can be self-destructive. "Spiritual progress" requires an intelligently and realistically enlarged awareness of improved results, on life's terms. (see pgs 14-15, 35, 60 & Step 11).With that increased power is then able to intelligently displace and rearrange "old ideas". (pgs 27 & 58). That freedom from mental limitations is acquired by developing an attitude of being willing to go to any length to recover.Strong emotional desires have fueled many erroneous beliefs. Wanting life to be a certain way is not always the way reality is. By improving conscious contact with reality (i.e.: "God" see Step 11), it became apparent that beliefs about "Santa Claus" were an illusion which existed in my own mind. It may have been shared by others, but like it or not: FANTASIES GET REPLACED BY ACCEPTANCE OF REALITYRepeated reliance upon emotional attitudes creates a habit pattern of thinking. (see pg 68). One which produces a childish demand to be "right", and includes automatic rejection of new or different ideas. "The Great Reality" is a reasonable synonym and concept for the word "God". (pg 55). Unhappily for some, any personal efforts to defend erroneous beliefs eventually yield to the Ultimate Reality of life, on life's terms. For others, it can be a welcomed opportunity to "trade up" to something better. (i.e.: "God's will" - see pg 133).By seeking an expanded awareness of reality (syn: "God"- pg 60(c)) it is possible to experience relief from problems caused by erroneous beliefs. This occurs by improving a conscious understanding of how to relate to that Ultimate Reality (see Step 11). All that is required is to place a demand upon ones own mind for an enlarged awareness of the truth (syn: "God"). If this is a dominant desire (syn: "prayer") it is possible to "let go of old ideas". (pg 58). By that personal choice people in recovery can change beliefs which had previously been guiding forces in their life. (pg 27). There was a time when that equality and freedom of choice seemed impossible. However, with new knowledge of reality, that personal belief system can be changed. 

 

Reality

Got to a meeting and we did step 8. I shared about the vacation and got support and human connection. The reality is "we" . I can find new knowlege in "we". I healed a bit and am well enough to begin "letting go of old ideas". It is scary, still hanging on. Hope to take younger son and his friend to water park tommorrow, they are so excited and that makes me happy. I would not have been able to do that if I would have shut down. and stayed in bed or picked up.

Husband????????? goes on shelf (and not top shelf). I need to pray.

Check out the workbook now.

Thank all of you for being "we".

accepting reality

very interesting stuff. i assume that's from the big book?

i see a great surrender of self to Reality as that text puts it. i see freedom comes from surrendering to the Truth That Is.

I see again and again that surrender to god is best for me.

----------
the touch of the master's hand: http://procrastinators-anonymous.org/node/1898#comment-27748

"fall down seven times, get up eight" - japanese proverb

Big Book

All Big Book Stuff-how easy to put in in the background.

On my knees again. I got the strength/courage to call resort. They told me to call time share which I did. They did not call back. yet. Things would not have gotten this far if it wore not for the airline oking everything on line, but whenever someone does something wrong, I feel like it is my fault. I need to heal a bit before I can move on this. My husband blames me, that's a whole different issue, but I know I can "trade up" if I don't shut down. thank you.

Journey 9 am lovely thread starter. & update

Traffic is back to normal so I was later to work today but still early, since I don't technically have to be here until 9, so that's ok. 

I'm behind and disorganized since I was out Thursday and, although I worked on Friday, I only worked a half day and I was pretty out of it at that.  So first thing on the agenda is to catch up on email, review project list, and then make my todo list.  It's hard to take that time to regroup when I feel that I'm already behind, but I know from experience that the time is well worth it.  So here goes.

UPDATE 2 pm:  I'm all organized, have my to do list, and I have attended two meetings.   Now I don't want to work.   I want to goof off.   BUT I'll get out my not-an-ipod mp3 player and listen to some good music and start checking off the rest of the items on my list.   Here we go!  3.5 hours from now I'll be on the way home . . . we can get through 3.5 hours right?

Update 3:30 Geez, this is the longest day in the history of the universe.  I swear it's been at LEAST four hours since i last updated :rolleyes:

DId some work on Project AB and some research on possible new Project TLM.  Now I'll work on Project VM for a while.   This is the biggest and ugliest thing I need to work on today.   I will work on it for an hour, then stop and take a break.  

Jo 

"The elevator to success is out of order.   You'll have to take the stairs . . . one step at a time." - Joe Girard