Tuesday 6 May 2008

I tried to motivate myself, but I figured that it wasn't the writing I dreaded, but I just felt bad. I gave up and went home.

I know the key is not to make good resolutions, but to get yourself back on track everytime you err. Today, I really don't feel like writing. Question is, is that something different from the usual procrastinatory dread for writing.

Am I making excuses? I don't know for sure. But in my personal experience I've found that it's often better to accept the inability to produce and do something that clears the mind, and makes me feel good. So not the habitual hanging around, but actively undertaking actions that get me back to feeling good about myself and my life. Usually, after that I feel like working again.

Important distinction here should be made here between the habitual actions like playing a computer gave, watching TV or eating junk food, and really indulge myself with something that raises my self-esteem. Things like taking a walk in the park (I've found that spending time outside in nature is important for me), cooking a proper meal, or buying something that helps to organise some part of my life ( I recently went to Ikea and bought a food container to keep leftovers. It was something I procrastinated doing for a long time, so it made me feel good I did something about it. It was strangely thrilling to have bought that container :D).

When I've indulged myself - deliberatly, not just by letting it happen - , I can feel that I take care of myself and my inner self relaxes, knowing I won't force myself too far.

Dunno if anybody can relate, but this is what I've found out for myself...

Still working on OPM, and it's going well, so I'm going to continue for another hour then go home.  I should be finished setting up the first configuration thingy by then.  Tomorrow I'll pick up the small tasks that I had planned for this afternoon, and then pick up OPM again after I get some examples/advice that I've requested from the vendor.

Tonight - I need to stop and pick up a replacement for my gas cap - that I lost because I was in a hurry to get gas and the "pay at the pump" thing was broken, so I drove off in a huff, squealing tires and shooting birds.  I'm just kidding about the squealing tires and shooting birds, but I did drive off in an annoyed state and left my gas cap behind. 

Also, pick up dinner, spend 1/2 hour on dishes and laundry, and get to bed early.  Wednesday is double header day at the gym, so I need to get plenty of rest.

 Journey 

“The key is not to prioritize what’s on your schedule, but to schedule your priorities.” - Stephen Covey

I've done OK, but not great. I've done the things marked above, and actually think the figure stuff can be postponed. I also had a long postponed meeting with PK (which went for 2.5 hrs, ugh), watched most of the Spanish film, and went to bible study.

The really urgent thing for today is to get final test data for my thesis, so I need to look at results from the mutant ER dataset (Done), get data for the cell cycle data set(Done), and run my algorithm on that. Then I need to go home and write for an hour. Ideally I'd also like to re-write my notes from the mtg with PK, as my handwriting got a bit messy after the first hour... And if I'm amazingly productive I'll read over my biochem papers as well. I'll plan on emailing/talking with PF tomorrow.