My name is John ... I'm 40-something ... and this is my first post on the forum. Several areas of my life are a mess due to pervasive compulsive procrastination, my business being first among them. I'm in danger of losing everything soon, including my home, if I don't quickly become proficient with a lifestyle of taking productive focused action.
Strange. Even as I write that it seems like such a distant and unlikely reality. Something that is so easy to procrastinate taking action on.
I was quite the producer about five years ago. I had numerous employees and a fellowship of colleagues that made moving forward easy. Today I'm almost completely isolated and have no one to hold me accountable to anything anymore. I recently developed a relationship with a fine woman and that's helping a little as she is a go-getter in her career. She's very accepting of me and has made no comments so far about my lack of work-ethic and productivity, even though she's aware of all of it. I'm sure it must be lingering in her somewhere, though.
I signed up for this forum days ago, but already put off my first post because I know my standard is to write long and thoughtful insights ... so procrastinating my first post made perfect sense.
I guess my real outcome here is to introduce myself ... (Hi Everybody!) ... and get my first post handled so I might be more inclined to come several times a week just to post a short message and read posts from whoever I might develop an online friendship with here.
Good luck to you in your new lifestyle. I'm grateful today that you all are here.
- Login to post comments
Open up to her, too
You mention your relationship, and how she is "very accepting of [you]." Do you feel like you can talk with her about the internal stuff that drives you to procrastinate? I don't know your relationship, of course, so I can't judge whether that kind of opennes would be welcomed by her or not.
Welcome to the group, John -- as others have noticed, you've taken a step by coming here and posting. Now you just need to do two more things:
Rest assured that there are lots of other people who procrastinate too, and we all have our own stories to tell and ways of dealing with the problem. Come back and let us know what you're doing and how it's working!
Thank you D & Lark
I appreciate the welcome and the advice.
Geez, starting with a process of healing a procrastination habit feels so uncomfortable. A few years ago I was in my first 12-step meeting (not related to procrastination). I never worked the steps, but I did attend meetings daily for a while. I had tremendous success and saw the power of even just simple meetings in my life.
I had to move right at the peak of this success and no longer attended meetings. I had another six months or so of success and then it unraveled.
Now it's several years later and not only do I still struggle with this other issue, but I'm also up against procrastination. Perhaps I'm just trying to make it hard for myself, but I'm also dealing with food issues to boot. I eat so badly and exercise so intermittantly.
In a perfect world, I would be in three groups. One for this original addiction of several years ago, one for this procrastination, and one for my abuse of food.
Not likely to happen.
I suppose there is an outside chance that I could visit three online forums and make diligent commitments to each ... and perhaps get back into one group ...
... I think you're starting to see how convoluted a sense of progress becomes.
One *really* comes to appreciate the old adage, "One Day At A Time".
If I try to grapple with healing in all three of these noticable defects in my character, it's just instantly overwhelming.
Well, I'm here right now and I'm giving myself a little pat on the back for posting. It was tempting to put it off.
In time, I hope to find one commitment somewhere that will bring improvement to all three of these areas of my life. One thing to focus on that will have numerous beneficial effects throughout my life.
Thank you again, D & Lark, for the hello. Anyone else who cares to post, I'd like to see if I can't in time get to know you all via this forum and share stories of success back and forth.
Hi John, I can identify with you!
I could have written your post six months ago, and actually wrote some similar ones. Things aren't great yet, but taking in account the way things were going for me last Fall, and now, they've not only stopped slipping, but improved a little. Sometimes it feels a little weird posting everyday, but it really helps. Please keep coming back and give it a try.
Welcome John,I don't think
I don't think you realize how much of a big move forward it is for you already - keep it going.
Remember: small consistent steps = Big success
That was the hardest lesson for me to learn - Hope it helps.
I hope you'll find some solution. I've relapsed into the trench of laziness. I'm lucky that I've got someone who doesn't contrribute to the problem by making me feel worthless. I once put away my habit of not performing and was a success in running a business. I realized a few goals that give me hope of coming back into the light of a new day, even though I've dug quite a hole, since leaving business. Today's a new day.
You sound like you're on the way up, to me.