Procrastinators Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from chronic procrastination.

Realms of Unreality

Hey guys,

I was wondering if any of you tend to be daydreamers or drifters through feelings of unreality on a regular basis or when your procrastination kicks in.

re:realms of unreality

I found this a very interesting query and I've been contemplating this since you posted it. My initial reaction was to say "No, I don't." But I think I've got to say that I do, except that I'd describe it a bit differently.

I often spend long periods of time thinking about current scenarios in my life that I'm anxious about and playing through hypothetical discussions in my mind. Like, if this person said this to me, I'd say such and such in response. And then if they came back with this next statement, I'd say this...and so on. I've heard this referred to as "stinkin' thinkin'" or ruminating, but I guess it could be considered daydreaming. I wouldn't call it daydreaming myself because to me, daydreaming has more positive connotations, and my ruminating is usually quite stressful and negative. I think it probably increases my anxiety, but I think I'm trying to prepare for and thereby control any possible situations that may arise. (Just read about this in the book "Too Perfect" where he talks about obsessives imagining the worst possible potential outcome of a situation, and then behaving and becoming stressed as though it actually occured that way.)

The other feeling I have quite frequently is that I'm sort of observing myself go through life, instead of actually living my life. Sort like watching a video of some place, as opposed to actually being there. Maybe sounds odd, but that's the best I can explain it. I'm quite puzzled by this.

I also have daydreams very similar to Monica's, about something tragic happening to myself and how others would respond, or about something tragic happening to my husband and what I would do then.

re: hypothetical discussions

Oh, me, too. I do this all the time. I wonder if it is really common or just common to our personality types.

daydreaming

I do get lost in my head (in a BIG WAY), but I don't daydream. My tendency is to get immersed in some area of intellectual pursuit - programming, learning about some interesting new technology or other topic of study, etc. Or I'll start obsessively reading books - either novels, or books on topics of current interest.

Monica's picture

Daydreaming

I'm not sure what you mean by "feelings of unreality" but I rarely daydream as part of my procrastination. I usually daydream when I am doing some mundane task like showering or driving or listing to my husband talk about his boring job (I know, not nice). I have a recurring daydream where something terrible happens to me or some other sympathetic person and everyone starts being nice or regretting that they had not been before the tragedy happened. Other then that, I spend the baulk of my waking hours thing about what I should be doing or what I screwed up.

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If I can't do it perfectly, I'll do it anyway. If I can't do it all, I'll do some. If I do nothing, nothing gets done.

"I don't feel like it" is a poor sacrifice for your dreams.