Procrastinators Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from chronic procrastination.

Someone plz help. They think I'm crazy.

The guidance counselor called today and told my mom I'm in danger if not graduating high school. My counselor can't understand why I'm getting almost all Fs and Ds when before I was a pretty average A and B student. I'm going to the doctor tommorrow so they can decide whether I'm depressed or crazy. My moms convinced to do what the doctor says, even if it means being put on anti-depressants. How do I explain to the doctor I'm a chronic procrastinator when chronic procrastination isn't even recognized as a disease? Please understand that my mother wouldn't understand if I tried to explain this to her.

Its semester 2 and...

Im doing better than i was before because i dont have the weight of all the work i didnt do weighing me down, but my mom and guidance counselor arent helping. What am i supposed to say? I know theyre trying to help but their making me feel a hell of a lot worse. Im ashamed of myself now when earlier today i was priding myself that despite all my mistakes i can forgive myself and move on. All i want is to be left alone. But thats not gonna happen, so what do i say to her?


Procrastination is such a difficult thing for non procrastinators to understand. I can't give much advice but can lend you my support and understanding.

High school was very difficult for me (not because the work was particularly hard) and it got even worse in college and during my post grad days. I only wish that I had the mature insight that you have shown in figuring out the likely source of your problem this early.  Your chances of conquering P before it starts affecting your life as an adult out on your own are great.  I wish you all the best.

to betwixful

as others have said, i so relate. When i was teen, i got the same pressure. Had my parents know how much HARDER it made it for me, they never would have done it.

One consolation: your mom loves you. she doesnt know HOW to love you best, but she is trying, to the best of her ability. Unfortunately, all of us grow up with imperfect parents who invariably, in some ways, hurt when they wanted to help. That's just the baggage we bring into adulthood that we have to work out for ourselves. But console yourself that your mom's motives, at least, are true. Try to see thru the obvious hurt to the love underneath. Maybe that'll help. I hope it does. It's like vic was saying below.

It appears your mom knows that your abilities outstrip your school performance. so in an unconscious way, she already knows your problem--performance. She knows you're not performing like you can. and you know that. And i certainly do about myself. She doesnt yet know about the addictive personality and compulsive procrastination parts of it.

And she may never get it. Some here have said that people who dont suffer never truly 'get it' because they cant imagine wanting to do something and not being able to do it. Like get up off the couch and get something.

So i think you should go to the Dr and get that counselor. If you say to your mom "i want to get counseling" she will be happy because she'll see that as a fix coming. My counselor says that compulsive procrastination and ADD have a lot of overlaps. ADD she says today is understood more about deficiencies in self regulation rather than the traditional 'attention' phrasing. LOTS of counselors are familiar with ADD. They often prescribe medicine, which i would personally not want. But at least you'd be speaking nearly the same language. It works for me and my counselor.


the touch of the master's hand:

"fall down seven times, get up eight" - japanese proverb


Just wanted to jump in with more support. I so relate to "wanting to be left alone." I'm not great at advice- giving, but wanted to send you kindest regards and prayers. High School was so unbearable (spelling?) for me, even though it was 100 years ago. I'm so glad to not be alone with this "procrastination craziness" anymore and I hope you will feel this way too!! Please keep coming and sharing!!

♥"Careful the wish we make, wishes are children. Careful the path they take, wishes come true..." From "Children Will Listen," by Stephen Sondheim.♥

(bewtixtful) [nice name by the way]


Sounds to me like those two are using the "we want the best for you" tactics, that really only end up putting another ounce of pressure on you. I think I know the feeling you are having about wanting to be left alone. Pushing yourself into an isolated place wouldn't actually be terribly helpful, probably. But that doesn't mean you have to let their "good intentions" push you into your own private hell. It really doesn't! You can keep your own counsel, and stay discerning. Keep doing the thing you're doing which is patting yourself on the back for what you HAVE done, despite how hard it felt at the time.{Yay!!!! no really, YAY!} And refrain from reacting off the cuff, as best you can. With CBT, you can stop right before you are convinced you have to give them a piece of your mind, or dive into apologies or excuses, just take a second to examine the thoughts that go through your head, and pick which ones you really want to act on....checking yourself before you speak or even roll your eyes. You don't have to lay waste to their day or rile them up with resistance. You don't have to do anything that makes them worry or makes them come back again with more of the same. You can keep on doing what you need to do without letting their involvement be a distraction. It's all possible! Life can be better and you can decide what help you can accept from those people who do care about you. And you can keep using this site for perspective, knowing there are people who understand.

Gnothi Seauton ~ Know Thyself



Praying that the doctor's visit went well! 

And I'll second what others have said about seeing a therapist.In my experience, therapists
-are really understanding (that's kind of their job)
-have seen it all before (chronic procrastination seemed like a kind of weird problem to me, but appraently I didn't invent it :) )

I got some helpful suggestions (and also encouragement to keep using this site!)


I've been thinking about you and praying for you.   Please let us know how the doctor visit went.   Assuming your medical doctor is a good one, he/she will probably recommend you see a therapist.   I'd be suspicious of a doctor that just throws drugs at you, but, seeing a therapist is an awesome thing to do.  Especially since you don't feel you can talk to your mom, it would be great to have someone to talk to about this stuff.  

And, you know, WE understand!


Never have an ordinary day!  - Pepperidge Farm (lol)


Hi, I want to just say I am so happy for you that you have a concerned mom and guidance counselor, who know you and believe in you enough to see you are not a loser, but just “do not understand”.  I have 2 teens in HS and believe me, I realize it is almost impossible for them to believe I have their best interest in mind and am not judging them or trying to control.  I have them tell me if. 1.Sound of my voice2.look of my eyebrows3. Repetition are blocking what I say because at least that is something” I “can change  so at least they can hear me. “Sometimes” that works. In the program they say “act”, do not “react”. Antidepressants have nothing to do with being “crazy”. If your body biologically needs them for a chemical imbalance (due to stress, etc.) they will help, but if there is no chemical imbalance they will not do a thing, and checking a person physically is always the first step, even if you are a procrastinator, crazy, or sane. They will not make you happy or productive, all they do is get you balanced so you can physically be healthy. This may be a chance to ask the doctor for a referral for someone to tak to. Believe it or not, you are not the only teen having these issues, I am so happy I am not a teen anymore, I would not want to go back, pressure on teens today is unbelievable and I know with my teens, I am the last person they want to talk to.  The PA (ers) at this site share their experience, strength and hope. We are not professionals or give advice. Most of us have used or continue to use some form of outside help at one time or another. I wish you luck and will pray for you, along with my 2 teens, I know even though they act like it is a joke, deep down they love it when I pray for them.And keep coming back, it helps to know you are not alone.   Never lose heart. All is well.


I've had issues with depression and procrastination since I can remember. I've now gotten to a point where i'm handling the depression well but still struggle with procrastination.  Much soul searching has helped me progress past some of the procrastination issues.

Procrastination can be caused by many, many things. Both physical and psychological.

I would agree that talking to a real therapist or psychologist  (preferrably one who specializes in Cognative Behavioral Therapy and/or Addiction Recovery) would be the best course of action to help you discover the underlying issue leading to your procrastination. My personal feeling is that trying medicine first, even if it helps, will only mask the real issue. thereby putting off finding a lifelong solution. Depending on your insurance it may be necessary to visit your primary care doctor first to get a referral to a therapist.

I wish you much luck and support.

As an aside, I have always had a really hard time with finishing highschool scared the %$# out of me and I subconsciously sabotaged myself because I was scared of moving on and 'becoming and adult'. I wonder if this could be a factor in your situation?

Keep posting here and we'll lend whatever support we can.

Re: Discovering

Hi Crazybug. I wanted to pipe up to say I agree with what you've mentioned about transitions. I think I've identified that in myself too. And I also found the principles of CBT to be valid for me too. My experience with anti-depressants was that it was fine for a while, but weirdly changed my personality over time (or at least, I missed myself when I was on them too long.) Anyway, for me, I have felt best when doing the work, (CBT style stuff, behavioral and responsible), but being drug free. Oddly, a big portion of the behavioral stuff that helped had to do with eating and sleeping and exercising on a regular basis.


My two cents.


Glad you are here, betwixtful. I wish you the best. Keep trying and keep your eye on what you really want. And want to do ultimately.


Gnothi Seauton ~ Know Thyself


Why don't you trying going to a psychologist? Perhaps he or she would be more understanding.


A medical doctor would often like to see a patient try talk therapy with a clinical social worker or psychologist, before trying medication.  Perhaps you could ask the doctor for this alternative?  It may be difficult to find a therapist who can help with procrastination issues, but therapy can be a good thing, it might be worth a shot.  Its impossible for me to know what you need; the doctor doesn't know you much better, I'm guessing.  Good luck!

"Why not get it done now?"  RexRoth


There's nothing wrong with meds if you need them, but I agree with firefly, your medical dr. shouldn't just put you on drugs without a therapist's recommendation.   Most medical doctors won't do that anyway.


Never have an ordinary day!  - Pepperidge Farm (lol)