Procrastinators Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from chronic procrastination.
Procrastination is the grave in which opportunity is buried.
Perhaps
Perhaps Normy is responding to the second person you used above, pro. You said "only ~you~ [emphasis added] know." To make it clear that you were referring to your own experience and what is helpful to you, you might have said, "for me, only I know." We are all used to hearing second person used generically these days, which might be why you used it, but when I read "You" in print, it really seems directed at ME personally! Probably so to Normy, too.
slacking versus respecting your needs
Historically, I have had this confusion, too, of course. This is what I'm working on, and seem to be making some progress with. For me the problem comes from being generally out of touch with what I truly want - being out of touch with myself. The key to solving it (for me) is being able to identify what is behind my disinclination to do different tasks. That lets me respond appropriately.
Some examples... I didn't want to exercise this morning. I asked myself why. Answer: I don't feel well physically, and for good reason - I had a knock-down, full-blown, killer migraine this morning. I didn't want to do my paperwork (handle mail, file, pay bills). I asked myself why. Answer: It's tedious. I accept that, then think it through - yes, it's tedious in the moment, but the result is something I want and would make me happy, so I choose to do it.
It's very empowering to connect with myself in this way - ask myself in a moment of choice what I'm feeling and what I want, and then respect my inner truth. This feels like a huge breakthrough for me. I'm going to write an article about this in the next few days - tomorrow, if I have time, or this weekend.
Want to
Seems to be a powerful phrase. It sure helps me make decisions without so much angst. I'm learning to just make a decision and move on rather than spend so much time thinking I "should" decide a certain way. Things change and decisions are rarely permanant, anyway.
procrastination and honoring one's own feelings
For me (don't know about anybody else), a big part of my procrastination has to do with ignoring my wants and making everything into a "should". It's significant and important for me to have been able to recognize that this morning I'm not up to exercise because of the migraine I woke up with, and to respect this rather than trying to force myself to do what I think I "should" do, regardless of my feelings or needs. This morning, by recognizing and respecting my needs and feelings, I kept myself from turning my morning Pilates from a "want" into a "should".
Learning to recognize and respect my feelings and needs in real time is a very big thing for me, and highly relevant to my recovery from procrastination. Many times I drive myself like someone beating a tired old horse (me being both the driver and the horse). Sometimes I really can't do something, and I need to learn to respect that.
pro's CI - 9:20am
Gettin it done CI 8:50
Done:
fix breakfast
DD0 down for morning nap
CUOP
TO DO:
Check weekend weather/ plan date W/ DH.
Get DD3 ready for gymnastics 9:30
Get DD0 dressed
Go to Post office then Gymnastics
come home
Lunch for all
Kids down for naps
Clean up Kitchen and Liv. Room
Laundry
Relax time
Dinner
Call Baby Sitter - Confirm
Call Elaine
Relax time
Lights out 10:30 p.m.
talking to myself
I don't know if I can handle this rejection you guys.....sniff sniff.... I'll just leave chatbox now since noone wants to talk to me.... Not even my DH,...... :(
Hehe.. J/k. although it would be cool to use it...
chat box
I've never been into real-time chats, so my ignoring of the chat box is nothing personal. I installed it because I know other people like it, but I think people forget it's there. If we ever do online meetings here, we'll use the chatbox for that.
Check out the chatbox,...
I thought I'd give that chatbox a try but you guys must be asleep
I was wide awake
But I was ~almost~ lying down - at the hygienist's.
1Focus 8:36
Proudly Accomplished:
Morning Routine
• Out of bed 6:00 (target 6:00)
• Ready for anything
• Feed DD0
• Breakfast
• Unload dishwasher
• Head to work
Work Routine
• Meet with staff/general plan
• CUOP
• Time Sheets
• Specific plan for the day
I want To Do:
Work Routine
• Clear my head
Work Plan:
• Meet with contractor 9:00
• Prioritize project list
• Misc stuff
Evening Routine
One big focus:
Clean up financial responsibilities
• Stay on top of “always
"want" to do
Thought I'd mention that your to-do lists say "want to do". :)
How are you doing on your One Big Focus? Making progress? Do you schedule a time for working on it? I find that if I don't schedule a time for something, it doesn't happen.
One big Focus
Thanks for asking, I'm in pretty good shape as far as finances go. Last week I made sure to work on 1 small "next action" every day. Suprisingly, it only took a few days of that to get finances to a decent balance point. I'm making sure to continue to do the things to keep it balanced (I use balance because money is slippery stuff, unexpected, or forgotten, things pop up all the time.) for another week or so. Then, I think I can let it run for awhile while I take on something new. It's amazing, just knowing exactly where we stand financially, even though it includes debt, takes a big load of my mind.
pro's CI - 8:20am EDT US
Migraine is gone so I can get back on track with my day now. I am very grateful for medical science and Imitrex.
Handling mail... I'm trying to figure out the best place to put this in my day plan. I originally had it in the morning and that worked best for me functionally, but the thing is, the mail isn't in my box until 4:30-5pm, and at that time I don't feel like doing it. When I put "Handle mail, pay bills" after "Get mail", the mail piles up. So I'm going to go back to putting it in the morning. I'll handle the mail the day after I get it - next day is better than next month!!
I also moved "review to-do list" from the beginning of the day to the end of the day. In other words, I'll plan the next day at the end of the current day, which is what I notice I've been doing anyway. This helps me to stop at a reasonable hour instead of time bingeing - especially when I'm programming. I make my next-day to do list from a combination of "rollover" and whatever specifics are due the next day. Maybe I'll start posting my next day to-do list the day before, as JestRight does.
These may sound like trivial details, but they are very important to my getting things done. If I think out these details and make a routine time for doing these tasks that works for me, I do them. If I don't do this, these things don't get done.
still not caught up on posts
I'm still not caught up on posts, sorry. Often I read and respond to messages in the morning while eating breakfast, but this morning I was incapacitated by migraine. There are quite a few messages I want to respond to but haven't had a chance to yet. I will soon.
Norm's 1pm BE
Everything going according to plan so far! Looks like I've got more work at the Uni ~and~ at the gym. Not sure how long the Uni thing is for; the gym one is temporary cover for someone who's off.
Rexroth I saw a quote (I think in my in-tray) about falling down and getting up again (or something similar) - I'll be working on my in-tray later so if I come across it I'll post it.
~~~TaDa~~~
*I'm up!
*Cleared spam (~lots~ of spam as I'd not been on the computer for days)
*Checked Emails and responded to two (been offered some more work at the Uni, yay!)
*Breakfast meeting - discussed running yoga and massage day
*Teaching (been offered more cover)
*DDog's laundry
*Mobile phone on charge
*Lunch
~~~ToDo~~~
*Brush teeth
*Banking
*Hygienist
*Weekly Review
*Give friend a lift to DIY store (I can do some shopping when she' in there)
plus regular Thursday stuff
pro's CI - 7:15am
I woke up with a full-blown migraine. My head is still hurting so unbearably that typing seems to jar it and hurt. I stood under the shower for a while since the sensation of water on my head distracts my nerve endings from the pain. My rescue meds haven't kicked in yet - it's been 15 minutes. It usually takes 30, I think.
Can't type more. The noise from the keys hurts. Feel like I'm gonna die.
40 minutes
I still have the headache, but there is definite improvement. The noise of typing doesn't cause my head to feel like it will explode.
I'm drinking coffee and eating toast now. Made the coffee straight up instead of mixing it with chicory like I usually do to cut the caffeine. Caffeine helps migraines - shrinks those blood vessels back down.
Good grief - who invented migraines? What a curse. I read an article saying that people who have physical sensitivities like migraines and allergies (I have both) have a higher incidence of psychic sensitivity. I read another article saying that people with migraines have a higher sex drive than those who don't get them. (I'm just trying to convince myself that there's some good side to getting these killer headaches.)
I once got a migraine in my ocular nerve - no pain, but lost sight in my eye for about 45 seconds. It was scary as hell. My father once had a migraine in his leg. I don't remember the details of that - what his symptoms were or why the doctor thought it was a migraine. He didn't get migraine headaches. My mother does, and sister. Not brother.
Ah yes - 45 minutes now, and definite relief. Imitrex is a wonder drug.
Caffeine
Caffeine dilates blood vessels - blood vessel constriction is often a problem in headaches as well as migraines, which is why aspirin comes with caffeine in it. Not good for someone like me who is caffeine sensitive! Oh well.
opposite
I believe it's the opposite. Migraines are caused by a dilation of blood vessels in the head that press against nerve endings (or so doctors believe). Caffeine is a vasoconstrictor, and thus helps migraines by reversing the dilation. It helps more if you don't drink it every day, but I'm not into quitting caffeine right now (I have in the past).
Vaso-dilator or constrictor?
Hmm, I thought it was a vasodilator because that's what it does to me - very evidently. When I drink coffee I go bright red and my skin becomes very hot. Some of the web sources say it's a vasoconstrictor as pro says though:
Relieve Migraine Headache
How Stuff Works - caffeine
However, the BBC says caffeine vasodilates, but then you can't always trust the BBC on matters of science...I'd be inclined to go with pro's assessment except for the effects on me personally. Maybe it vasoconstricts brain blood vessels and dilates body blood vessels?
Whatever the science, we know it works in the short term, and probably isn't a healthy thing in the long term!
flush from caffeine
>When I drink coffee I go bright red and my skin becomes very hot.
That happens to me, too. In the morning, my whole body sometimes breaks out in a sweat from coffee. But I believe that's from its stimulant effect, not it's effect on blood vessels.
Rubor & Calor
But redness and heat are caused by dilated blood vessels (it's an inflammatory response) - maybe those effects are local to the skin.
hmmmm.... dunno
I don't get flushed (red), but I see what you mean. I'd have to research this to sort it out, and that would be a major procrastination, so I will have to be content for now with not understanding this. :)
P.S. What's rubor and calor?
Withdrawal
Yes, It's withdrawal from caffeine that causes headaches due to a robounding effect. One of the reasons quitting caffeine is so difficult.
getting off caffeine
I've quit caffeine 2-3 times, for 6 months or so each time. As I recall, I still got headaches, but I didn't keep records so I'm not sure if they were less or not.
Quitting was pure hell - major physical withdrawal. I'd get a migraine that would last three weeks, so bad my entire head hurt, even my face. My cheekbones would hurt. I'd go through this pure hell, get off it, feel a very pleasant leveling out of energy - no more "jangling". And then - addict that I am - at some point I'd think "just one cup of coffee now and then would be nice", and of course I'd be back up to my pot each morning in no time.
I have a lot of coffee in the freezer right now, purchased on sale. Maybe when I run out I'll think about quitting again.
maybe I'll start tapering
Maybe, since I still have coffee, I could start tapering down. That would make the withdrawal a lot easier.
Related story
My brother had a friend in college who used to deliver pizzas. While on the job, he would grab a Coke from the cooler between every delivery, and drink it while driving. He decide to quit drinking soda, for the sugar probably. He was in the emergency room the next day. They couldn't figure out what was wrong with him, and there was serious concern that they might lose him. The doc finally started asking about lifestyle changes and he remembered that he quit drinking soda. He was drinking more than a dozen 20oz.ers a day. The doc immediately ran to the soda machine down the hall and bought the man a coke. His body responded instantly, full recovery etc., etc.
Tapering is a great idea, caffeine can be some nasty stuff.
Wow!!
That's pretty scary! :O
30 minutes
It's been 30 minutes since I took the rescue meds, and my head is still pounding. But I think I feel a slight edge off it. Maybe wishful thinking. Maybe it was 40 minutes that it takes to kick in.
I've heard you can get intravenous forms of Imitrex so you don't die waiting for it to be absorbed in your body.
Yes, definitely easing slightly. Still hurts like hell.
headaches (1Focus)
Why am I typing when the key noise hurts? Because it hurts unbearably no matter what I do, so it seems like it hardly matters.
I knew I was getting a migraine last night, but I thought I could get away with not taking the meds. Why do I do that when I know?
But I had a thought, related to the discussion I had with 1Focus about his migraines being triggered by stress... Perhaps you are getting tension headaches and not migraines. Those are definitely caused by stress. Or, in some people, tension headaches can trigger migraines.
I had to close myself in the bathroom with my fingers in my ears to grind coffee this morning. I'm very noise and light sensitive, and slightly nauseous.
Rexroth 10.26 BST
Didn't post yesterday and am posting today on the basis that there is no fault in falling over, the fault lies in not getting up again.
up prayer
check emails and spam respond as necessary
check mail respond as necessary
wash and dry sheets
45 min legal/admin project
select and post Mum's birthday card
30 min craft project
walk and meditate in wood and feed squirils and birds
bath and wash hair
stretch exercise
visit antique auction preview
get money out of bank
research exhibitions for Saturday date
journal
final email check
prayer
bed
sleep
and that's it folks. Glad you are here.
Rexroth 22.5 BST
Fed only one squirrel
Second day did not do craft project
Could not get money out of bank but not a problem
Everything else done and some done well
And its my fifth day wihtout coffee and drinking only a little tea and for the first two days I had a headache and how.
So night night Rexroth
Norm 7.50 am BE
~~~TaDa~~~
*I'm up!
*Cleared spam
*Checked Emails and responded to two (been offered some more work at the Uni, yay!)
~~~ToDo~~~
*Breakfast meeting very shortly!
*Teaching (cover at gym)
*Hygienist
*Give friend a lift to DIY store (I can do some shopping when she' in there)
plus regular Thursday stuff
Hi Normy!!
Nice to see you again. We missed you here!
Now the remaining mystery is... Where is Milo?? I miss her, too.
Thanks Pro!
I think it's Milo's last week in her current job this week - she'll be finishing things off there no doubt.