Procrastinators Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from chronic procrastination.

Wednesday 20th September 2006

OK, here we go, gang. It's WEDNESDAY!!

----------------------

Lovely graphic added by pro.

Creeeeaaaak

I hear another mind opening :P

Seriously, I appreciate your willingness to at least consider the possibility that maybe there is a connection. Most fellow headache sufferers that I share this with react differently. It's almost always along the lines of "I understand that emotional connection for you, but it's different for me." Most folks aren't even willing to consider it as a possibility.

considering versus agreeing

Much as I'd like you to be impressed with my open mindedness, I have to be honest and say that I don't think my migraines are emotionally triggered.

I know there's a mind-body connection, and I'm very sensitized to it. I've seen it operating with my colitis, and with small breakdowns in my immune system leading to colds and the like. But I've never seen any connection between emotional stress and my migraines, and I've observed my migraine patterns pretty carefully over the years. I make an effort to notice the triggers so I can avoid them where possible. I've never seen a connection between my migraines and stress. It's always some kind of physical trigger.

So while I'm willing to consider the idea, in the end I reject it - for me. I hate to sound like your close-minded friends, but I have to say... Your migraines may be triggered by emotional stress, but mine are not. :P

JestRight - 12:12 midnight - Opening Bookend

EDITORIAL COMMENT:
Re staying in the rails - so far, so good.

Re other stuff, talked to Miss LS, we discuss things openly, and yet I think she is not open with herself. Seems to go nowhere. Problem is anyone who would fall for me that hard and for that long has got to be at least as screwed up as I am.

Not going to let myself be crushed. Leads nowhere. Sent out a few messages on the personals website. Life goes on.

DONE AS PLANNED OR POSTPONED:
6PM TO 9PM
Errand or HealthAppt
Odometer, Unload, DeForward; BORKey; Undress
Khoong/PMHerbalTea/TodaysSchedule/LightSupper/Dishes
Bathe/Shave/Teeth/Face/Bed/Redress
Ready2Go: HerbalTea, BachWaters, Breakfast, Vits
Ready2Go: Gymbag, Hankie, Cards, Clothes; Mail; Trash
ClearDesk@Home, ToHome, Receipts
9PM TO 11PM
Dance/Music/Movies
Friends/Family/Personals/MySpace/Blog
Writing, Reading, Alarm

REMAINING TO DO TODAY:
6AM TO 10AM
BootUp, CoffeeOn, Khoong, TBN, SplashFace/Comb, Creflo
AMHerbalTea, PourCoffee, Feet, Bed
Icebox (HerbalTea, Breakfast, Vits); GurdjieffMeditation
Deodorant, SuitUp, Cell, BORKey
CoffeeOff, WindowsOpen, Forward, Load
Drive2Office, CellOn, CellMsgs, Confessions, Call Mom
ClearDesk@Office, ToOffice, Contacts
Finances, NetSpend, MailOut
Vits, Breakfast, Teeth, PlanFun, PlanLunch
Messages, ClearDailyEmail, FreshWTD, 9amCALLS
10AM TO 1PM
Want-To’s (am)
1PM TO 3PM
Vits, NNHerbalTea, Lunch
Want-To’s (pm)
Chores; HousecleaningAppt
3PM TO 6PM
Drive to Gym; Change; Warmup; Gym, Core; Swim
Sauna&Stretch, Bathe, Redress; DriveHome

Yes, perhaps a break would be good.

Just my opinion.... I must agree with both Little Sister and Pro here, that one your seem to be being a little to hard on yourself, and that once one relationship is over it's good to take a break from things for awhile. Clear your mind, figure out what you did/didn't like about the previous relationship, what made it work/ what didn't. Have faith that another will come along and when it does, you enter clear, and not comparing the next person to the last. Not saying that that makes the loss of a relationship any easier, just that when one is lost, a person needs time to greive.

Someone once shared a poem with me after a 5 yr. relationship that i was in ended. It changed my perspective... I still keep it on my fridge... Look for it under the Inspiration forum topic. It's Called comes the Dawn. I put it there cause I thought everyone might enjoy it.

why do you think this?

I'm not sure I should be commenting, since I haven't followed the history of this relationship but it really struck me to read this sentence:
Problem is anyone who would fall for me that hard and for that long has got to be at least as screwed up as I am.
If you put it in a few words it is like saying that noone in their right mind would love you, which strikes me as you being too harsh on yourself. You are a loveable person.

Unfortunately

Unfortunately, it is indeed possible to love someone who is screwed up.

Ah well - let's not dwell on this.

perhaps take a break from relationships?

My experience has been that after a break-up, it's best to take a break from relationships for a brief period to center yourself and get fully over the previous person. Otherwise any new relationship is sabotaged because you're not fully ready.

Of course, my relationship history is one failure after another, so take anything I say with a grain of salt. :P

Hard to explain

Hard to explain, Pro, but I don't really need a great relationship. I need someone to love.

Yes, we're all supposed to be Nietzchean supermen these days, nirvana-dwelling swamis who need nothing and nobody.

But until I reach that state, I need to function. Different drugs are available to deaden pain and give fresh energy. Beer, music, art, valium... Women, too, can be one.

Great realtionships= love

May I suggest a great book to explain what I mean - Codependent No More by Melodie Beattie. It was a real eye- opener.
My pictures of what love is were so skewed for so long, it was only after going through a 28 day treatment program, and then a 2 week program follow up to that and a week long realtionship retreat did I figure out what love really was. Not suggesting you go sign up tomorrow or anything, just that it's a really diffcult thing to get a handle on. I was where you were thinking I just "needed someone to love" when what I really needed was to love myself; derive my happiness and well being from my relationship w/ Myself and my higher power. My current marriage would have failed if I hadn't done that work. It's still hard some days to remember it's up to me to make myself feel loved... anyway, That's enough about that, didn't really mean to have an advice column, but I can definitely relate to how you feel. If you want to know more just ask. :)

hear hear!! I second that!!

I couldn't agree more - on all counts. I also second your recommendation of "Codependent No More". Melodie Beattie's books on codependency are the best.

love addiction and emotional dependency

JestRight - please excuse me if this is intrusive, but it sounds to me like you have some serious dependency issues, and this will get your way in any relationship. A healthy person doesn't want to be in a relationship with someone who's extremely needy and dependent.

There are 12-step programs that deal with this issue of making another person your higher power - notably Codependents Anonymous and Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous. I've been to both at an earlier time in my life, and they helped me enormously. Both have Web sites - google them and you'll find them.

stll ruminating

"you have some serious dependency issues, and this will get your way in any relationship. A healthy person doesn't want to be in a relationship with someone who's extremely needy and dependent."

as much as i DETEST hearing this - as much as i want to answer "yes i KNOW" like a teenager and plug my ears...

i guess i will grudgingly admit that this is the source of the problem, or my end of the problem anyway, in this last relationship.

OK then.

skeptical

been to 12 step meetings and i hate them, thanks anyway, it doesnt help much to hear very sick losers repeating 10 minute monologues about their lives or lack thereof to a captive audience.

hevent heard of the first group, i'll check it out. in fact i'll check both out. i live in a different part of town now, maybe the losers dont live here.

but my experiences with ACA and SAA were dismal. AA was neutral, just a waste of time because it didnt apply.

pardon me, but...

...I was one of those "sick losers" talking at 12-step meetings for codependency and love addiction, and I ended up with a lot of recovery. I sponsored people for years in both programs. I don't do this stuff anymore. I truly resolved these issues, and I would not have, if not for 12-step programs.

You can learn even from the sickest people in the room. I've heard many people in CoDA or SLAA meetings bemoaning their situation, and it would be clear as day to me how they were sabotaging their own lives. I couldn't see it in my own life, but I could see it in them and I knew it applied to me, too.

Remember this deep truth... What we hate most in others is what we hate in ourselves. :)

Out of the frying pan...

I will be going to suffer the gloomy monolgues of SLAA tonight at 7:30pm.

I gripe, but I do listen to advice - sometimes.

Thank God it's a "Speaker Meeting." My brother always told me those were more uplifting - I've never been to one.

YEA YOU!

That's a great way to get started. Hope you enjoy it and can benefit from it!