Procrastinators Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from chronic procrastination.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

(hope) check-in

I met the 2 dumb deadlines at work today. Have another due the 31st. Really didn't think I could do it, but with your help, I did!!!

Need to turn over a confusing thing at work. My bosses gave me a nice gift today and I was sure I wouldn't get anything, after all, I call in sick every 5 minutes, my mistakes are many & laughable, etc. I'm in a tizzy as to whether I should still leave & I feel guilty. Turning it over.

Here is a list of the things I'm not doing, but need/want to be doing:

-come home each night and do one cleaning chore in the house.
-Turning over and putting it out there - since my dream job feel to excrement - on Sunday I want get my website up and running and this feels like an impossible task. I will use the chatbox.
-Turning over and putting out there - find out how to meet with a Score counselor.
-Turning it over & putting it out there - take a vacation day in the New Year and schedule a time to meet with a counselor for help in starting my business.

Warm blankets to you all!!

♥"Together we could do, what we could not do alone.♥



Next 2 hours

Tsk 1 din

Tsk 2 lan

The newness of posting is starting to slip and I am not as on top of things. Can't let this happen. Will check back in.

Check In/JKL

Bkft done

email (done)

Call AU

Camera (done)

mtg Dr

hugz to Freedom

Hope you get over your cold quickly! 

How you spend your days is how you live your life - Edge

kromer 10:04 CI

Good morning, all!

I have lots of work to do today! Lots of household stuff/xmas shopping, and some work-work.

So far, I've been to the grocery and hardware store, and checked on my mice. 

Today I need to:
*Email deacons
*Get gift certificate for G, order bday gift for A, shop for xmas cards and wrapping paper (going to do some of this now)
*yell at landlord, if he's home
*make cookies for church, buy fudge ingredients
*Do basic analysis of VAD data (and microburst looking at other RNA-seq data) (have made some progress on this)
*Analyze RT data (have made some progress on this)
*Finish organizing papers (have made some progress on this)

If I have extra time, I'll look into HPLC/send email, and study splines.

OK, heading to the chatbox now, to do the basic analysis of VAD data. 

Vic 12/17

Show up (done)

"Nothing is so fatiguing as the eternal hanging on of an uncompleted task. "
William James
I have so many tasks I hang on to that I really don't know how I will complete them, but at least I am showing up, so I have hope.

Journey 8:45

I'm actually early to work today.  I've been to the gym, had to stop by Mal-wart to grab a couple of things on the way to work, and I've read email and checked my calendar.  Going for coffee then making to do list.   I'm irritated with myself that I didn't make those phone calls yesterday so today I'm going to make at least ONE of the three phone calls I need to make, and plan a nice little reward for doing it. 

I'm still working on my two goals of 1) being on time and 2) completing my todo list each day.   I've been working on those all year, and making some progress but I haven't conquered them yet!   I will say I am on time to my Tues/Thurs exercise class about 75% of the time now, but I'd like that number to be more like 95%.   It's ok to be late once in a while if something happens to really delay me, but most of the time it's just dawdling or oversleeping that makes me late.   I'm almost always on time for appointments now, so that's a good thing!  Getting to work on time is not really an issue, since I don't technically have to be here until 9, and I'm almost always early. The second goal, meh.  I'd say I complete my todo list maybe two days a week, which is an improvement over NEVER but still needs work.   There are a lot of factors that go into making a doable todo list, and then sticking to it.  *sigh* progress not perfection, right, friends?

OK, off to the coffeepot, then back to make todo list and get one of those phone calls out of the way.  



How you spend your days is how you live your life - Edge

Journey 11:50 & update

OK, it's almost noon and I still haven't made that phone call.   On the positive side, I did finish a rather onerous (sp?) administrative task of ordering some work gifts.   I sort of got assigned this task because I'm a girl and the other female in the group did it last time.  But anyway, it's done.  Now, I'm going to put some tea in the freezer so it will be "iced" tea this afternoon, then pick a phone call and just do it.  I'll check back when it's done.  WHY do I hate making phone calls SO MUCH?


UPDATE 12:10  I am ON THE PHONE YAY making the hardest of the three phone calls.  Now was that so bad? 

UPDATE 12:15 made call #2, got voice mail, left a message. 

UPDATE 12:26 did #3 by email woot!


How you spend your days is how you live your life - Edge


I'm with you. My "New Year's Resolution" last year was showing up on time. When I started doing that at meetings and people would come up to me and tell me how upset they were that I came in late, I had no idea some people could feel that way, then I started coming in late, then I just stopped going.

So it is scary to think about it but I do know I felt so much better when I got somewhere on time.

Thanks Vic

re: on time performance

Being on time or even early absolutely rocks, but I think sometimes I sort of run late on purpose so that I can talk myself out of going somewhere I don't really want to go (like the gym).  So even if I'm late I still make myself go.  If other people are annoyed, that's just too bad lol.  But that feeling of knowing that I have to walk in the door late skeeves me enough that I'm on time more often. 


How you spend your days is how you live your life - Edge


Thanks Jo,

Yes, I am going to try again this year. I just had no idea it affected  people that much. One of the meetings even suggested not allowing people in the meeting past a certian time. My philosophy has always been it's better to show up for even 5 minutes that not show up at all. I just felt judged and that just added to my self loathing of not being like others. I limit myself to places where i can still show up whenever., I am so grateful for this site. Thanks.

on being late to 12 Step meetings

ok, I just have to weigh in on this. I nearly lost 25+ years of recovery from life-threatening addictions a few years back, after a couple of control freaks at my former home group got a bug up their butt about my lateness to meetings and would not get off my back about it.  Funny, they were both very large women (I am petite) and curiously they never bugged the chronically tardy men, just me.

Anyway I left that group with a major-ahss resentment and stayed away from meetings for almost a year until dis-ease drove me to seek a different group.  The Big Book in the chapter To Wives mentions the critical wife who nagged her sober husband about his cigarettes and coffee until, in a fit of rage, he got drunk about it. 

My sponsor says I was only "late" to my first meeting, LOL - and that any meeting is better than none. There are lots of people in the rooms who are still working out their rage about not being able to control the world. Today I say: Screw 'em.  It's better to give a resentment than to get one.  But because I hate conflict, I never say this out loud. Rather, I just seek out another meeting where the Big Book's values of kindness, courtesy, justice and love are actually practiced, not just idealized.

You/we are not obligated to please the Meanies.  They are not seated at the right hand of your Higher Power!

re: being late

Well said, Ag. 

How you spend your days is how you live your life - Edge

GeorgeSmiley, 12/17

 7:29 AM

Good morning. 

First: Project L-C

Second: Project T-L

Other individual tasks as time/opportunities permit.


Want what you have. Be who you are. Do what you can. ~Forrest Church (1948-2009)

The Hero's Code:

Show Up. Pay Attention. Speak the Truth. Let Go of the Outcome.

Agnus check-in, updates

Good morning, dear friends!  Just had an interesting talk with my sponsor about how my morning Step 11 often becomes a lengthy session of prayerful thinking, feeling and processsing emotions, with reading and writing as well, that sometimes lasts 3 hours before it is "done."  She corrected me on this, saying it needs to have a clear beginning and end (just like a meal in my OA program).  So I will keep an open mind and today try something new: time brackets around my non-work time.  It feels a little foolish not to have realized this on my own, but such is the nature of addiction, I guess.

  • Step 11 for 30 minutes, then eat, shower and dress actually 50 minutes; progress anyway!
  • Start work by 9 actually 9:30 - progress anyway!
  • key factors worksheet currently in progress
  • call 3F re contract
  • ok webinar, upload software
  • prep for team call 12n
  • Project EM reading
  • timecard and expenses
  • annul1
  • OA minutes
  • 30 mins on the meds pile.

Ag finale

When I planned my day and MITs I forgot to allocate 1.5 hours for the team call, 1 hour for food/lunch and 1.5 hours for a dental appointment - SO lots of stuff needs to carry over to tomorrow. But, I did not procrastinate today - yay!

  • Step 11 for 30 minutes, then eat, shower and dress actually 50 minutes; progress anyway!
  • Start work by 9 actually 9:30 - progress anyway!
  • key factors DONE!
  • call 3F re contract Not done
  • ok webinar, upload software Not done
  • prep for team call 12n DONE!
  • Project EM reading Not done
  • timecard and expenses Not done
  • annul1 Not done
  • OA minutes Not done
  • 30 mins on the meds pile.Not done 

(FreedomRoads) re the Steps

PA uses the same 12 Steps as AA, Alanon and OA.  Only the name of our addiction (that over which we are powerless) and the gender-reference to God differs among them. 

So when I say, for example, that I work Step 11 every morning, I mean that I "South through prayer and meditation to improve my conscious contact with God as I understand (God/Him), praying only for knowledge of God's will for me and the power to carry that out."

In practical terms, I try to do just what the Big Book suggests on page 86 every evening and morning. If you don't have the book you can read it when you scroll to pages 15-17 here:

Hope you continue finding answers here. I've read some of your posts and it sounds like you are well on your way - welcome!

Rexroth checkin


emailed Thank you to friend for thoughtful email get well card

started work on medical file


Continue work on medical file

I'm tired and unwell but I'm getting better and am well enough to work a bit and it is better for me than lying on my bed feeling miserable.

Regard Rexroth

Rexroth progress

It is progress though it is (I am) slow

I've put all correspondence in order in a file and have updated the list of addresse and recipient

Next I need to put the photocopies in order and to print out some letters and put them in order.

Finally I need to list what I still need to copy

I have received an email from my friend who had an office party tonight expressing my sympathies to the office photocopier.

I feel weak ill but more chearful and positive as I am doing something constructive however slowly.

Regards Rexroth

Rexroth further progress

I'd got about half done and on looking in my file found that at the beginning of September I had already made a file of copies so I have wasted most of today. I've decided to forgive myself and stop for the moment as I'm tired and getting comfused. I nearly tore up the file in annoyance and had I done so I would have torn up other letters which I need to keep. So I'm done for now.

Regards Rexroth

Solidarity (Rexroth)

Getting older isn't for sissies, is it?  :P  It alarms me to find myself reprinting papers I've already printed (sometimes just moments before!) or similar antics.  A friend who studies such things says we are not "losing it;" rather, we have filled our brains with so many wonderful, interesting bytes of knowledge through the years that they have little tolerance for the mundane things of life anymore.

Isn't that charming?  Now if only such charm could help me find the overdue bill the collectors are calling about!:rolleyes:

Glad you are giving yourself mercy.  It takes even "normies" awhile to recover full capacities after surgery.  Thanks for sharing the path.

Thanks Agnus

Thanks for support Agnus. Don't like to think of it as old age more that at the time I was worried about going into hospital and going to court. What I needed to do was to look through the file first and I was in too much of a hurry to do so. Anyway today, Friday, I'm about to start again and try to finish it up.

Regards Rexroth

CL daily overcoming


today i am behind at work and wanted to take time off to relax and finish xmas shopping and enjoy the season. I have end-of-year work deadlines. that's getting my down. I have to give this issue over to God, and remember as Brother Lawrence said: "It's all Your business."

next right action: quiet time.

the touch of the master's hand:

"fall down seven times, get up eight" - japanese proverb

Mama_Cat's picture

Good morning...

It's hard to take on that today's a new day. To have hope in this new day. Yish.

It's easy to hang out in fatigue and hopelessness. Easier, in fact.

It takes a different kind of effort to step in a new direction, the direction of recovery. It's takes being willing to feel a new kind of fear, and uncertainty. For me, at least. And, as unfulfilling and damaging as the old behaviors and thoughts are...this is the devil I know.

But if I take a biblical interpretation to my higher power, well - who better to cast those demons out? I like that. Hadn't thought of that one before.

 Keep comin' - that's what works for me today. Just keep showing up. Ugh.

Today's to-dos:

* Citations

* Morning meeting

* Make coffee

That's good for now. Thanks for listening -


Mama_Cat's picture

Good evening... :)

So, my update on to-dos for the evening.

Since I got home I've: 

* Scooped cat litter  (DONE)

* Changed & Ltn  (DONE)

* Gotten some water  (DONE)

* Done 4:30 phone check in  (DONE)

* Kissed the hubby Kiss  (DONE)

* Fed the cats  (DONE)

* Played a couple computer games  (DONE)

NOW, my plan is:

* Spend 10 minutes coordinating schedule  (DONE)

* Call client and schedule meeting time  (DONE)

* Call K and schedule call  (DONE)

* Call J and schedule call  (DONE)

* E-mail AM I've done that  (DONE)

* Call A about filling in  (DONE) 

* Come back here and set up next actions! Laughing 

OK - that's good for now. Thanks!




Mama_Cat's picture

Next three hours

* Work on com prt paper


Hugs for Mama_Cat

Thinking of you, Mama_Cat :) Hope today goes well :*

~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Nothing diminishes anxiety faster than action - Walter Anderson

Mama_Cat's picture

Thank you, Hope

I've been reading your posts, but been so immersed in my own "stuff" I've been procrastinating responding! X-[

Wishing you well with it all. One foot in front of the other! :)

Warmly, MC 

MC - no worries!!!

I would cringe if you added me to "the another thing we didn't do right list!!.." I know you have lots going on and I'm pulling for you and know you can do it...

For me this is a different level of trust and I can't explain it.

I just saw an interview about a successful man (an average person - not s superstar on TV), who started some business and they asked how did you do it...he said some time it didn't look like I could and I didn't even know what I was doing half the other...but looking back it all came together. (This isn't profound or anything we haven't heard before - it just struck me because of his Brooklyn accent and confusion on how it really did work out).

I too have a sense of hope.

May the HP force be with you!!

♥"Together we could do, what we could not do alone.♥

Edge's CI - 12:42pm

Good morning. It's more like noon here.

Woke up late today because I've been staying up till past midnight these past few days. Enjoying my week off work, but I should be using it to study instead of hang around like I'm doing =/

Yesterday I finished proofing 2 chapters of HL, so happy about that. Also plan on proofing one or two more chaps today for the group.

Tomorrow is my assignment deadline, so need to finish and submit it today. Will try visualizing myself doing that to get myself in the mood.

Also, I've realized that if I wait for myself to get into the mood to start working on my to-dos, the mood is never going to come. "Start before you're ready", that's what I should do.

Haven't been taking my meds lately either, and I've already missed my morning meds thanks to sleeping in, so instead of blowing the rest of today's scheduled meds I'm going try to take what I can.

First need to go grocery shopping for mom, once I'm back I'll start organizing my day. Hm, feeling anxious about setting my to-dos because I don't have much confidence in my ability to see them through. But I'll do what I can and will leave it at that. Something is better than nothing.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Nothing diminishes anxiety faster than action - Walter Anderson

Edge's CI - 2:28pm

Back from grocery shopping. Filled up the car tank, bought kitty food and litter, and took hmed 1.

Now to the actual studying =/ Also need to visit the bank and withdraw some cash to pay my uni fees. It's very windy today, looks like it's going to rain.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Nothing diminishes anxiety faster than action - Walter Anderson

Edge's CI - 5:35pm

Making progress on my assignment! :D All thanks to the prompting of a friend ^_^ Also finished proofing another chapter of HL. Haven't bothered with my meds, but I'm not worried. Right now I just want to finish my assignment. At this pace I'll be done with it tonight :) Happy.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Nothing diminishes anxiety faster than action - Walter Anderson