Procrastinators Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from chronic procrastination.

HELP PLEASE

I have a simple task to do and it is very much in my interests to do it and I can't, whatever can't means. So I am posting asking for support and help.

I've been involved for many years in a business/legal/property dispute and have lost a lot of money, time and self-respect by not dealing with it. Last wednesday I had a letter from my solicitor who says that the other side want to settle a significant part of the dispute by paying me £26K. I have to email back with a few figures and ask him to go ahead. It does not mean that it will be resolved but there is a good chance that it will and now the only person who is holding up the process is me. I have spent the last few days thinking why and I don't know and even if I did I don't think it would help me.

So I am stuck in pure and simple procrastination.

And I am powerless over it.

Over to you folks

Rexroth

anyone who can help?

Rex,

 Many congratulations on sending the email.  I just had to send a business invoice that also brought up many feelings about what hasn't been done, how things went in the past, costs to myself and other. But now it is almost done.  One thing I'm thinking about looking ahead is getting professional help - a bookkeeper - next time I have invoices.  So that it isn't all on me, a task I'm not good at.  Is there any further professional help you can get from your solicitor as this moves forward - maybe a face to face meeting on future decisions so that you can just get it done verbally, have him or her send off the email, any other written needs?

I am fairly new to this site, and I was moved to read your history - that you had posted on this and helped someone else move past a big block on it. Thank you. 

 

Thank you peaceit

Thank you peaceit. I have a problem is knowing when to get and how to use professional help. Yesterday I felt ill still recovering from operation. Today I received a huge bundle of papers from the other sides solicitor.

I am glad I have a solcitor to sort this out.

Rexroth

@Rexroth

Just work on it for five minutes!

Jo

How you spend your days is how you live your life - Edge

Thanks jo

Strangly it took me only about fifteen minutes to do the calculations and write the email. And several hours thinking about it.

Rexroth

Rex

I know it doesn't help much, but I'll be thinking of you today, Rex :)

It sounds like you're making some progress. One thing that helps me get moving is playing music I like in the background and not caring whether what I'm working on comes out perfectly as long as it gets done. I can then edit and fix it later once I have the bulk down. I don't know if this is applicable in your case, but if it is then I hope it helps :)

I'm also sorry to hear that you're not feeling well :( Sending you hugs and positive thoughts, and wishing you all the best, luv. Maybe chanting "just do it" to yourself will help :grin: It gets me moving, heh.

Rootin' for ya! :*

~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Nothing diminishes anxiety faster than action - Walter Anderson

Thanks Edge

Thanks Edge,

It does help that you are thinking of me - thank you and everyone else.

I sometimes can write something first time but other times I goes through many drafts.

Rexroth

Encouragement to Rexroth

Dear Rexroth,

It is largely because of all your postings in prior years about this type of thing, that I gained the confidence to work on similar situation in my own life, and worked through a huge block.

Every time I felt paralysis, I remembered your posts, and filled out the next batch of paperwork.

I did win a reasonable amount of money, which I have used to help rebuild my life.

I am happy to send you encouragement and blessings now!

Peace and strength,
-- movingalong

Thanks for encouragement movingalong

Thanks for encouragement movingalong and thanks for reminding me of what I have done and can do. I think I might be nearing the end of problems but I do not know and am powerless over what happens. I just need to do my bit.

Rexroth

(rex)

Neil Fiore: The Now Habit:

three-dimensional thinking : consider any of the places to start, don't limit yourself to one right place; permit yourself time along the way to learn, build confidence, and ask for help don't be critical that you're only   starting when you "should be finished."    

Thanks vic #3

I should have been finished several years ago. But I can't now do something different then.

I've taken the file out and written the email and checked the maths and hope I have it right. I've asked him to email and/or phone to check things. Oh and I have sent the email.

Incidently I had reached an aggrement with the other side last February so for once the procrastination was not mine. But over the last few days it has been and the I need to be clear over what is my responsibily and what is someone elses.

Thanks vic

Rexroth

(rex)

I don't know why all these replies posted and I can not delete them, so I just did an edit. One more good one:

Don’t do nothing just because you can’t do everything.

— Bob Pierce

The solicitor probably wants to get paid as well, do you like him/her?Sometimes when I feel someone does not have "my" best interest in mind, it makes me drag my feet with things. 

 

Thanks vic again

This solicitor does. Previous solicitors have had problems beleiving what I had to say. I don't know what I am afraid of. One of my friends who is a addictions counsellor sayd the only way to know is to take the action and then I might be able to understand. Trying to understand first does not work.

Rexroth

(rex)

Did you consider calling the solicitor? How about sending him an e-mail and have him write up the figures? Just a thought....I have so much unfinished business as well, I don't understand it, but posting here does help.

 

Thanks vic

Solicitor has written up the figures but has made a slight error so I need to tell him. The other problem is that the figures are not exact in that the law says that they must be reasonable and he is in a better position to advise what that means.

Also the solcitor sent the fugures to me for checking which is my job as it was my business. This follows DA and BODA principles.

Thanks for support and guidance

Rexroth

(Rex)

I so know this process. I get this sick feeling in my stomach through it all, even if it works out in my favor I still feel sick. I have a hard time with standing up for myself, even if I have been wronged, I don't want to deal with it.

You are doing great, it may not feel that way, but you are and it is true sometimes it is better to sit on things like that for a few days. When it is all done you will be relieved.

Even though the solicitor is in a better position to know what is reasonable, sometimes they just don't think unless you ask, if you haven't already. Maybe the e-mail thing again? Something like "I think these numbers are reasonable, do you?"

I have a feeling it all will be ok.

Take care, Vic

Thanks vic

Previous solicitor did not know what was reasonable but this new one does and I get on well with him and trust him. I am now being sued for not completing a property deal when the only reason it has not gone ahead is that the person has not come up with the money and the papers. He has had since February!

Rexroth

(Rex)

I don't know the details, or what the laws are there, but here, if a contract is not executed by date in contract, it is null and void or requires an extension. Sounds like you have the solicitor that will work for you, if you get along and trust him, that is key. They get so busy, they sometimes forget your questions and never seem to take it personally when asked or e-mailed a question. You are getting there.

Thanks vic

My solicitor is well on top of this one and what you say is what he says. When its over I'll write the whole story or maybe just the high lights.

Thanks for your support.

Rexroth

(Rex)

That's great. I believe what you need most in what sounds like a crazy situation is a good solicitor and sounds like you have that. Hope it is over soon. I will put you, the solicitor and the situation in my prayers.

Take care,

Vic

(Rex)

That's great. I believe what you need most in what sounds like a crazy situation is a good solicitor and sounds like you have that. Hope it is over soon. I will put you, the solicitor and the situation in my prayers.

Take care,

Vic

Rexroth, I hope you have

Rexroth, I hope you have seen my previous post.  I propose we support and encourage each other today.  In 5 minutes I am setting my timer for 30 minutes and will see how many letters I can deal with in that time slot.  A short break, and another 30 minute slot ... What do you think? 

Maria

Thank you Maria

Thank you Maria I forgot in my post to say that I am ill which makes things more difficult and I can't offer ongoing support today. But thank you for your kind offer. When I am well again I will be happy to.

Rexroth