Procrastinators Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from chronic procrastination.
Monday, October 12, 2009
Happy Monday, everyone!
"The most basic precept of all is to be aware of what we do, what we are, each minute. Every other precept will follow from that."
~ Thich Nhat Hanh, Zen master
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Post being moved to Tuesday....
What I posted here belonged under Tuesday.... :-o
Spirit 10/12
Hello all-it's Monday and a late start checking in today. I have had a moderate morning, nothing earthshattering but I am clear I am moving sluggishly so I needed to checkin here and post my plan and work my program.
morning check in completeddishes cleanedkitchen space cleanedbreakfastlunchcheck emailsreviewed action planrevised action plango to outside location to work30 minutes on creation of promises of recovery for morning phone meetingedit proposalEvening list-45 min
Spirit
Monday, October 12, 2009 Check-In
Monday, October 12, 2009 Afternoon/Evening Check-In Plans for Hope
; do Excel etc. adds) for1:45 - 5:45 pm1:45 - 2:30m5:45-6:30pm6:45-7:30pm6:30pm ?7:30 -8:45- ??9:10 - 10:40pmREWARD: Enormous satisfaction and a good night's rest for finally getting back on track (with the help of this great site and some inspiring, motivating music)! Noticed it helps me tons to get back to work and stay focused if I track in detail how I use my time.
How do people do these check block thingies?
~~
Want what you have. Be who you are. Do what you can. ~Forrest Church (1948-2009)
The Hero's Code:
Show Up. Pay Attention. Speak the Truth. Let Go of the Outcome.
RSVP to George Smiley
To do the "check block thingies," I just copied and pasted from an earlier group I saw here. I drop in new copy where the previous text was.
There is code to do "check block thingies" under Graphics for Forum too.
I'll need special prayers and support for today!
Hello everyone.
Today is got to be one of the hardest days of my life.
I will quit my job.
I have failed to complete critical tasks, some of which are considered company policy violations. I don't wan't to be fired and I think the most honourable thing to do is quit.
I see no other way out. While I see progress in me coming here, I believe I won't overcome procrastination as fast as my current job and it's current level of responsibility require.
I think it will be easy to communicate this to my boss, I have no issues in going to HR and delivering them my resignation letter... the tough part will be arriving home today and telling my wife about it.
I am not scared of the outcome. I believe a good shake is what I need... I just wish I didn't feel so frustrated at myself.
Thank you all for being here!
one step at a time!
Hi OCz A Special Prayer
Sorry about your job, I was once in that situation and it was the best thing I ever did. Also it is no longer uncommon. I pray that you can believe, that this wound is not a failure, only aq rung up the ladder in your journey. Vic
October 13 - The Sculpture's Skill
Lord, we believe, help Thou our unbelief. Lord, hear our prayers and let our cries come unto Thee.
Along the road of praise, as I told you. Yes! I will indeed help your unbelief, and in answer to your prayers grant you so great a faith, such an increasingly great faith, that each day you will look back, from the place of your larger vision, and see the faith of the day before as almost unbelief.
The Beauty of My Kingdom is its growth. In that Kingdom there is always progress, a going on from strength to strength, from glory to glory. Be in My Kingdom, and of My Kingdom, and there can be no stagnation. Eternal Life, abundant Life is promised to all in it, and of it.
No misspent time over failures and shortcomings. Count the lessons learnt from them but as rungs in the ladder. Step up, and then cast away all thought of the manner of the making of the rung. Fashioned of joy and sorrow, of failure or success, of wounds or healing balm, what matter, My children, so long as it served its purpose?
Learn another lesson. The Sculptor who finds a faulty marble casts it aside. Because it has no fashioning, it may regard itself as perfect; and it may look with scorn upon the marble the Sculptor is cutting and shaping into perfection. From this, My children, learn a lesson for your lives.
Then touched he their eyes, saying, "According to your faith be it unto you." Matthew 9:29
special prayers
that seems a great weight to bear.
i do find that procrastination recovery is not so much about making big changes and moving on, as it is about living in your current situation and making the best of it, day by day. That may prompt a suggestion to keep your current job for a while longer. But you're in the situation, so you would kno better.
i hope that you find peace and restoration whatever you decide.
take care OCz!
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the touch of the master's hand: http://procrastinators-anonymous.org/node/1898#comment-27748
"fall down seven times, get up eight" - japanese proverb
RE: OCz's request for special prayers...
RE: <<i do find that procrastination recovery is not so much about making big changes and moving on, as it is about living in your current situation and making the best of it, day by day.
I agree completely, clement!
As hard as it can seem, persevering toward improvement...going the distance and making the best of each day (sometimes each hour or even just each moment when challenges are high) with perseverance is worthwhile. As is thinking long-term--instead of short-term, so common to procrastination and self-sabotage.
Along the lines of your Japanese proverb above "fall down seven times, get up eight," I have read that many of the greatest, most successful inventors failed numerous times over before finding the right solution. "Success is failure turned inside out..."
OCz, you have my prayers--especially prayers for patience, courage, and faith in your Higher Power (and yourself).
10x Clement and Hope
and everyone else for your prayers, your kind words and for being here.
I started a conversation with my boss... we agreed to continue it in the afternoon as I was getting really emotional.
I don't think my decission to quit is definitive... but close.
While I think some change migth help me, my biggest motive to do it is because I don't wasnt to keep causing problems to the company and my coworkers.
I'll talk later with my boss and let you know how it went.
RSVP to OCz ... Food for Thought. Encouragement to hang in there
RE: <<I started a conversation with my boss... we agreed to continue it in the afternoon as I was getting really emotional.
I don't think my decission to quit is definitive... but close. >>
Glad to see your response, OCz, and glad to hear you're talking with your boss.
Can I put in my vote that the company already has plenty invested in you and that giving it another, renewed try is perhaps worth the effort?
Otherwise, just wanted to encourage you to please also talk with your spouse about this. It's such a crucial decision that affects not only you, but also her, and your marriage and future--especially in today's economy.
Here's something that I have had in front of me often enough over the last six years when I was so tempted to give up, quit, or walk away, especially when frustration was sky-high. Food for thought meant to be encouraging.
"Don't Quit...
When things go wrong, as they sometimes will, when the road you're trudging seems all uphill, when you're feeling low and the stress is high, and you want to smile but you have to sigh, when worries are getting you down quite a bit...by all means pray, and don't you quit.
Success is failure turned inside out, God's [or your Higher Power's] hidden gift in the clouds of doubt.
You never can tell how close you are--it may be near when it seems so far. So trust in God [or Your Higher Power] when you're hardest hit...It's when things go wrong that you must not quit."
You do know best, though, what will work for you!
I'll continue to keep you in my prayers.
Not quiting today! I'll work harder tomorrow!
I cannot thank you and some colleages enough for all your help!
I was so close to quiting! I felt like drowning this morning!
I have made a huge progress today:
There was a friend who gave me a great feedback, he said something like: "OC, excuse my words but that's all just BS! you shouln't care that much about not giving enough to the company... start thinking about your family and that you need to bring food to the table... If you really want to quit because you don't like your job, that's fine, but before you do, you must have a plan for it, and you must also walk that plan and get a new job or a new way to get income... until then, this is just BS and you need to go back to your desk and get to work right now!"
Oh my God, it sure helped! I come to the conclusion that I needed not to leave my work, but to have someone to talk to me like that!
Thanks a lot Hope, it is indeed a great thougth to be kept in front of me!
by the way, what is RSVP?
again, thank you all for being here!
one step at a time!
living the steps
Wow! What a great power of example you are for me, OCz! One of the biggest issues I have is getting honest with myself and others: fear gets hugely in my way. But almost always, when I finally am able (and willing) to speak my truth I get help. To me, this is a huge example of recovery, of the promises coming true (knowing how to handle situations that used to baffle us) and of living a truthful life. That is exactly what 12 step programs are about and why they work so very very well. As they say in AA, its simple, but it isn't easy. But the rewards of doing so are absolutely huge.
Congratulations, OCz and thank you for being such a great power of example!
asking for help to do the next right thing
such great news OCz
this is such great news on so many fronts.
first of all, GS, i felt so close to how you did. I was debating whether to say anything about advice on quitting or not quitting.
first of all, i have no place. It's OCz's life, not mine. Their decision.
but second of all, we're here to support each other in our common problem of addiction to procrastination. And i thot maybe i did see a familiar pattern there of trying to big-fix the situation or avoidance or something like that.
But now that this has all happened, this is like the 4th time in the last 2 years that someone came here, and their procrastination was really close to blowing up (eg losing job) and the person has chosen to come clean to the people in their lives.
and THEY ALL WORKED OUT GREAT.
dont have time to look up the links.
invariably people find out that
a) people around them are not so surprised to hear it (they have been watching our performance so they already know something's up)
b) while we tend to have a disaster mindset, other people almost always have a more positive view, even tho they may acknowledge a problem. We tend to think we're a complete failure; they tend to think we're a partial success. This is just part of the syndrome we suffer from.
c) there people in our lives who really love us and WANT to help us. i dont know why we just tend to ignore this fact. All part of the syndrome, again.
And the person who gave the advice about thinking about your family before the company--wow that was some wise advice. You were very fortunate, as you said, to have such wise counsel at such a time of need. I dont think i would have thot of it that way, probably because i'm a co-sufferer (co-recoverer!), but hearing it now, yes, that person is right on. Dont know if you're the Higer Power type, but that's one i would chalk up to the Big Guy.
i am a bit more emboldened to speak the truth, in love, to fellow recoverers, always respecting the other person's right to self-determination.
aw, this is just such great news. I feel like we should throw a PA party for OCz
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the touch of the master's hand: http://procrastinators-anonymous.org/node/1898#comment-27748
"fall down seven times, get up eight" - japanese proverb
You are a Hero
I should have kept reading. The job I left also 5 years later just sent me a letter to come back. I could either do contract work or be a staff emploee, I chose the first.
The Hero's Code:
1. Show Up.
2. Pay Attention.
3. Speak the Truth.
4. Let Go of the Outcome.
I'm very glad to hear this...
i was worried by your first post but kept my own counsel. I'm glad you got so much support even in your workplace, even from your boss.
Now, Keep coming back here.This place can be very helpful.
(If I just let it be so, I must tell myself!)
Welcome.
~~
Want what you have. Be who you are. Do what you can. ~Forrest Church (1948-2009)
The Hero's Code:
Show Up. Pay Attention. Speak the Truth. Let Go of the Outcome.
Congrats, OCz!! :-))
RE: <<I cannot thank you and some colleages enough for all your help!
I was so close to quiting! I felt like drowning this morning!
I have made a huge progress today: ... >>
OCz!! Great news!
You made such great progress and persevered! <cheerleading> So glad for you that you were surrounded by "resuscitators" so you didn't "drown"! May I say I am proud of you that you hung in there and allowed yourself to open up to other, more positive possibilities and did NOT let your pessimism or fear get the best of you?
I truly believe that often enough in life we need to NOT listen to the naysayers around us (especially ourselves when we are getting so negative). Why? Because if you give up, the chance for greater courage; a new, better perspective; and true truimph is lost for that situation! Over the past years when I was frustrated (or worse) and so close to quitting, I used to call up my strongest support(s) and say, "Remind me that quitting, giving up, is NOT really an option." I knew I wouldn't live well with my conscience if I did and that rationalizing quitting was perhaps just a form of denial in my case. I was giving too much power to my emotions and stress instead of learning how to improve my focus, attention, and determination, and patience.
Surround yourself by the people who support you in working towards a new path and who are able to remind you that what is behind you is nowhere as important as the chances that lie ahead. Sounds like you have a good boss. (Always a blessing!) So, though we all make mistakes...Isn't it what we do about them that matters most?
FAITH. Never ever let go of it, least of all when everything looks bleak. For faith is just that--the essense of things hoped for, but unseen. Trust, trust, trust in the capacity to handle adversity. Life challenges every one of us. And the challenges that come in the face of life's smallest and greatest adversities (especially unexpected) can be seen an an invitation to profound hidden strength, courage, excellence... And genuine peace that no pricetag can label. Persevere.
Tomorrow is a new day! The sun always rises, even when we don't see it...
~Hope, with lots of hope for you!
P.S. "RSVP" is French for "repondez s'il vous plait" (="respond please"). You had asked for "prayers and support"... My "RSVP" to you was = to my "response" or "answer" to your request.
wishing you strength and
wishing you strength and courage this afternoon, and with your decision OCz
ci 10.12.09 Babarino
Hi all! Thank you for being here!
I am just going to work through things on my desk. Not in any particular order. Need to just plow through some things.
Love the discussion on hero's code.
2:44
Plowed through one thing. I get frustrated because things don't go faster but the time something takes is the time it takes. I can't magically move it faster. When I feel like something is taking too long, I think i start scanning all my tasks, looking for hte quick one, and sometimes there just isn't a "quick" one.
"Slow and steady wins the race."
3:50
Another task done! yeah!
kromer 10:30 CI
Today is mostly a day to spend time with my family and relax, but I also want to review 3 probability lectures and read 2+ papers.
Morning all. Saturday I
Morning all.
Saturday I joined a gym. Today is the day I said I'd start going. I need to keep that promise. This isn't the first time I've paid for a gym membership only to say everyday 'I'll go tomorrow.'.
How did it go, DMan77? :-)
How was your GYM visit!? Congrats for starting again!
I can relate well to what you're saying about having paid for gym memberships in the past and thinking often enough "I'll go tomorrow." But also recall that once one gets into it, it's GREAT!
Am so looking forward to soon being able to taking my health club membership off medical hold so I can start up again post-physical therapy. Not being able to walk for a couple months gave new perspective to what I so took for granted (as most people do). It makes just thinking about returning to what I can now do again (walk) so wonderful, even if I'm not quite yet up to my usual speed!
What are your favorite things to do at the gym?
Vic 10/12
Show up (done) walk
Since Mr. Church's code #1 "showing up, seems to have made such an incredible impact on me , and until yesterday's post I never really took notice to the "hero's code"I feel drawn to look at #2,3,4 Maybe my "spirit" senses some recovery answers there.
1. Show Up. (done) by not shutting down for months, (I had a few close calls) something changed in my procrationation problem by doing this one thing
2. Pay Attention. ( a real challenge for me, but I like the words he uses, "pay attention", like telling a kid, pay attention, maybe from there someday I can be aware of each moment, but pay attention is something I can do,I have to know I can do something to even consider doing it)
3. Speak the Truth. (I like this, whenever I practice cognitive theraphy,and look at the truth it works for me, I can deal with all the unconcious lies/excuses going on in my head)
4. Let Go of the Outcome. (Always a challenge, every day, but when I do, I have peace and things do work out)
~~~ So, using this as my PA guideline for today:
1. done 2, need to connect time/tasks/I need to finish a report by Thursday/delagate chores to kids3. Truth- I cannot control my kids but I can give them consequenses4. I must put all in my plans in my HP hands.
Just a clarification
The Hero's Code is not from Forrest Church, just the "Want what you have..." litany.
That was confusing of me to post them in the order I did in yesterday's day starter -- sorry about that.
I first encountered the Hero's Code in a book by Susan Baur called the Love of Your Life. She got it from someone named Angeles Arrien, in The Four-Fold Way.
~~
Want what you have. Be who you are. Do what you can. ~Forrest Church (1948-2009)
The Hero's Code:
Show Up. Pay Attention. Speak the Truth. Let Go of the Outcome.
Thank you George
Guess I am being led to the book.
e's Monday ci
gmorning. I left the house in a big mess last night so I have to chase my tail this morning to catch up. That is getting to be a pattern and I am not happy about it. So far: dog has been fed, dishes have partly been washed, levo taken. I have a lot of straightening and then G has asked for attention to the front porch. Dog must go for a decent walk. Also, project boots: killing the mildew must begin.
I think I will start on basic routines first: heading to www.nowdothis.com to set up a one thing at a time action plan.
asking for help to do the next right thing
CL daily overcoming
9:07 : i dont have a plan, but i kno i need one, so i'm checking in.
9:39 : can only see next step--quiet time.
10:01 : sort of started quiet time, but got distracted. I thot for a short quick note to someone, but grew bigger. :,(
restarting, as usual.
- "i will never be able to do otherwise if You leave me to myself" - Brother Lawrence
(amazing how that plays so easily with addiction)
10:49 still haven't started. :,(
modifying quiet time into a 1-2 min prayer / meditation.
- lord, i implore you to give me the ability to pray without ceasing
- on today's failure: i will never be able to do otherwise if you leave me to myself.
- it's all Your business
- fill the void inside me so that i need nothing
i have to remind myself of what my normal schedule is.
ah yes, check meetings and emergency only email
11:04 -- there was a lot of mail. responded to one (which was wrong) but it was very short response (1-2min).
i am so happy to be back on task, even if it is 11am. I am soooooooooo tempted to beat myself up about that, and bemoan my failure. But god is teaching me to not do that. He is teaching me:
- "i will never be able to do otherwise, if You leave me to myself"
that takes my focus completely off me and onto Him. And that makes me love Him.
and all that makes me remember--i have had monday's where i never get going. Yes, spend the whole day in various distractions, however fun and interesting, they're not MITs.
And so i have come to see 11am as progress, and be truly grateful that it is not later. This seems like a miraculous change of perspective in me.
continuing my daily routine tasks...
12:21 - larger-than-usual daily task done.
had interruption with family.
had lunch.
now back to it.
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the touch of the master's hand: http://procrastinators-anonymous.org/node/1898#comment-27748
"fall down seven times, get up eight" - japanese proverb
GS: 7:15 AM
MIT#1: Project U
MIT#2: Project P-12
I'm also frustrated because my No. 2 son left his math book here before going to school today, despite my asking him twice if he had put his backpack together (and he said yes, he had).
Mrs. GS is supportive in me NOT rescuing him (which I would be doing by running the book over to his school). He is 12, almost 13, and needs to learn responsibility.
I'm just hoping his mother (my ex-) sees things as clearly as that.
~~
Want what you have. Be who you are. Do what you can. ~Forrest Church (1948-2009)
The Hero's Code:
Show Up. Pay Attention. Speak the Truth. Let Go of the Outcome.