Tuesday September 15, 2009

Please do not leave advice.  Thank you.  Prayers welcome. 

On Wednesday 090909 at 4:11am, I committed to a 30-day detox:

• No youtube, no youtube watch network, no youtube on other sites whenever I can avoid it, no ustream, no blogtv
• no fan lines, especially saynow.com
• No facebook
• no okcupid or other dating sites, including jdate or Plenty of Fish
• No contacting men I find attractive on Myspace
• No Internet chat that is not twelve-step or for work purposes. 
  When I think about doing this with someone I need to come back to my
  personal objectives. 
• No public blogging on livejournal or blogspot and other such sites, but I can use blogger for private journalling, if necessary.

And I'm committing to the following toplines:

breakfast

thirty minutes of exercise{running, swimming, yoga, dance, ballet, tap, karate, walking, jogging}

a daily assessment of my goals and affirmations 

brushing my teeth and using listerine in the morning

brushing, using floss , listerine and a periodontic brush at night

I just realized that as a consequence of one of my goals, I need to stay alert of when the company I want to work for is having internships.  I book marked their website, so that I can visit it more frequently in order to discover when they have internships available in my area.  I'm open to working in all English-speaking countries, so long as they sponsor my relocation, but I'm pretty sure the states are my best bet for getting hired.  I have also submitted an inquiry to the deans of the Math and CS departments of two community colleges in my area.  If I think of another CC around here, I shall definitely contact them and see who is available.Also geting a fellowship and working for my own department seems like a great bet.

...its already tomorrow in New Zealand.

Here's me posting in Tuesday's thread and its lunchtime Wednesday here.  This is confusing... I'm telling you [in the Americas] what I'm going to do with the rest of today (Tuesday) when today is almost finished but for me its already halfway through tomorrow (Wednesday) and I've not even started.  Wow!  Talk about adding to your burden.  Anyway....

 ....halfway through the day and I haven't even started.  Here's the plan for the next three hours:   Half way through and 1 is done.  Ahem.  Got lost in some sideshows - starting to get a better understanding of WHY I've procrastinated.  Humph. 

1. Lunch.  If I don't then I'll just get more distracted and won't work.

2. Work on that single thing and only that single thing and only for the next three hours. 

Its time to Exercise brute-force willpower thing.  The problem I have is that the task is a black hole.  I have to write some documentation for a pieice of work and these things can go around in circles. 

TTFN, E.G.

Hi Guys,

Welcome to the newcomers!!

I keep trying to get the "me" back that used to accomplish everything and juggle it all and be on top of things, but I just can't get there??

These are the things I'm procrastinating about today:
-plugging in all about a month's worth of receipts into my monthly expense chart
-logging in my checkbook and balancing checkbook

Work wise I'm still so behind. I need my boss to help me, and she is very unavailable.

Not to look at things as being half empty, I'm improving...I guess it's my perfectionism calling? I don't know?

Wow, what an imperfect share, so unlike me!! YAY!!!

Regards and Smiles as you walk through your day!!

♥"Kindness and truth have met, righteousness and peace have kissed." Psalm 85♥

There is a lot to do today, so I am remembering that I need to chip away at things in baby steps and by the end of the day there will be a whole lotta chips on the ground! I will not carve Mount Rushmore overnight.

So far, spat with my significant other about sleep and dogwalking. Did not handle this well, because I was badly sleep deprived. Forgiving myself for that, but know I need to pick up the pieces later.

Walked dog, took morning meds. Need to take second meds before I forget! Doing that now....

1.26 took morning meds. Working on getting those taken at an earlier time. Radio is on which is a big motivator for me. now scheduling pickup for BB/BS. Then planning dinner (chops defrosting).

tasks for the day: cook dinner, work on steps, meet with sponsor, launder, return bottles, C to shop up hoodies, 8 pm with S to help her with taxes. File. shift money. put returns in car for returning tomorrow. 5 minutes on dining room table.

asking for help to do the next right thing

Woke up sluggish this morning with a mild case of "I-dohn-wannas" so I've taken an extra hour on Step 11 prayer, meditation writing, phone calls.  I've let coffee and diet sodas slip back into my days since Saturday, so my sleep is disrupted which can wreck alot of my recovery.  I'm getting anxious about tomorrow's trip, the work I'll be doing, and the work, study and taxes I won't be doing because of this trip.

After Step 11 I dumped the coffee, made tea and a gratitude list: I am caught up on bill-paying, laundry, housecleaning, and J's medical care. I live in a decent house with two nice vehicles int he driveway, a paid-for camper in the yard, 2 pets, and a dollar more than I need.  I have good relationships today with everyone in my life. I have great health considering my addiction history, and wonderful 12 Step programs and fellowships to help with all my addictions.  Best of all, I have a God of my understanding today who is more powerful than any of my craziness!

I'm going to micro-burst work tasks for 20 minutes, then focus on studying until class time. Then I have massage therapy at 3:30. Then I'll prep and pack for the trip, have dinner, and be available for some service work I offered to do. I have a 12S meeting from 8-9, then I'll prep for bed and relax a little. Happy "procrast-abstinence" to all!

recommitting to CIs

to my bottomline tasks today

to task l

first--leave the morning's events and info behind; I can do nothing about it now--this is hard to do.

Today I'm in lab a little late (but I stayed late yesterday, so it's not a big deal).

Today MITs are:
*Make 2nd overview graphic
*email DR re: staging, elim. germ cell layers (will do this soon)
*description/graphic for Dmc1 expt (working on this now)
*Get RNA-seq protocol, read all protocols (will do this soon)
*Harambee and deacon notes
*Notes to SM, BP, TH, M+FWC

*Review CAC protocol from MG (will do this soon)

Other tasks:
*Start description/graphic for germ cell elim
*Get readings on staging
*Abstract, summary, acknowledgements
*Pick Dmc1 age
*Get readings on staging

Okay, at least I managed to get around to posting a tasklist by LUNCHTIME today - got on well with clearing up urgent tasks this morning ahead of the massive work bomb that's going to drop on my head soon :)

And I still don't feel I've given myself enough to do at home... !!

Show up (done) There is a phenomenon of  synergy that activates when I show up here. For that I am grateful,(I had "greatful' before- ego? otherwise I would NOT be here. "Something" is happening.

ck in later. By the grace of god, faxed in the whole application. I am exited about this-miraculously found all the papers needed, including immunazation records from 2005 and last yr report card- trust me only my HP could have done that!

Now walk-I have put it off cause itis boring- but if I don't go now, I proved I will not go later.

I do believe in Divine providence he had his eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living, part of the overall purpose he is working out -in everything and everyone.

Once again, my HP has done for me what Icannot do for myself, thank you HP, for finding me , you are still there in spite of me.