Hi PA Group :)

Hi everybody. I'm new here so I thought i'd write to as a sign of appreciation of your postings and advice. Things haven't been too good for me recently and I came to a stage where I had to investigate what the problem could be. I've had many events to look back on and take into account. Why have I lost jobs? Why have I let relationships fizzle out and find it difficult to formulate new ones? Why was I so dependent on cigarettes, alchohol and soft drugs for over 10 years? These are just some of the questions I have been asking myself.
In the last four years I would say i've hit 'rock bottom'. I've become a hermit and a regular caller to The Samaritans. Communication, even just chit-chat has sometimes been fractuous (even with the Samaritans!). I have found that even the people that do care ask 'why are you so hard on yourself' etc etc.. it gets tedious after a while. You question yourself, it stops you doing normal everyday things that most people take for granted. Basically it's a vicious circle until one day it gets so bad that you realise it's turning into depression and the reason why you change outfits three times a day.
I'm going to see a counsellor tommorrow to try and untangle this mess. I'm 33 this year and want to start living.

All the best
Andy