Procrastinators Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from chronic procrastination.

Thursday, 9 April 2009

Hope-Faith CI 4/10/09

First CI in a while I am going to have to set time frames to accomplish task. Again not something that I like to do but it is effect for me when I need a starting point.

4:00 leave home for Dinner and Moive -- New Hannah Montana movie have to wait in line about 2 hours to get in.

3:00 start getting ready


  • Put away folded clothes
  • Wash 2 loads of clothes
  • Shine Sinks
  • P/U House
  • Update Financials

 Time to get on task -- I am working backwards. Humm I love to read Magazine Articles backwards -- I have never worked from the bottom of the list maybe it will work.


Pyrotecher CI 8pm PDT Thursday. Reflections on a setback week.

Not much positive to report since my last check-in Friday 4/3/09: 

My wife has been out of town most of the week to visit her family and I've done my best to support her emotionally and by taking care of things at home. But the way I've handled "holding down the fort" has been a sorry mess. My already poorly controlled schedule has been abysmal this week, staying up way too late handling chores (one night to 5 am - I brought in the paper before I went to bed.)

Naturally this made an even worse mess of my work schedule than usual, and my productivity to go with it. The urgent/critical task I identified to handle by Wednesday still isn't done.

Back at home the taxes aren't done either, nor any other project other than the immediate and urgent.

Not surprisingly, in trying to address these things I've been making just about every other procrastinator's mistake in the book:
- time binging,
- bad prioritization, and
- just plain distraction;
- inability to make myself break out of routine for the sake of higher priorities
- "Newton's law of Procrastination" ( definitely applies. The only time I've really hustled all week was when I had to be somewhere by a certain time, hence motivated by something external.
- My accumulated to-do's from the week are a pile of unprioritized sticky notes.
- I've also been short on sleep (more than usual) through most of the week trying to make up for the late nights, which just makes me tired and obliterates my judgement skills.

There's also a sense of depression that's feeding and being fed by the procrastination cycle. All sorts of things have been feeding my depressive thought cycle: My wife's trip and the family emergency with my in-laws. Moderately bad news from friends. Car trouble. The untimely death of Angels pitcher Nick Adenhart (I'm an Angels fan and absorbed a big chunk of the media coverage.) As the depression /tiredness /procrastination cycle builds, I start to dwell on other stuff that not only I can't do anything about but which isn't even relevant to what's happening now.

Obviously I have to break the cycle and get my brain in gear. So what's first is to
- get a good night's sleep,
- intervene to interrupt the negative thought cycle
(on the latter, I know the basic cognitive concept of "you feel how you think" but I haven't significantly developed the tools for dealing with it. Realizing what is going on is the important first step, though.)

Then I need to set some schedule for myself to get out of time-binge mode, pull that pile of stickies into a least a list, and then identify the most urgent and important tasks to tackle on Friday... and start doing something about them.

If I can get that far, I've made progress. My hope is that I'll have learned at least to recognize and act on this more quickly when the cycle starts next time.

"Dost thou love life? Then do not squander time, for that is the stuff life is made of."
Benjamin Franklin

You are not alone

Thanks for having the courage to share.  In order to "rewire" our brain, I believe, it  need to assess what is in there now  and not "judge" the wiring (I know that is easier said than done). Then we can "bring it up to code".  I can identify 110%

I don't know why this site works but by thE Grace of God it does.


PA Tools

I am attempting to make a step for tomorrow.

I just came back from the store with my milk and was kind of in panic mode. Tomorrow is my last full day here and I need to plan. I looked at the PA tool section;

There are two important levels to the planning process:

1. Planning what to do.
2. Imagining yourself doing it.

Now this is probably the only place I can state my insanity and be understood that thus far I have avoided finding out how I will get to the airport Sat. Morning. My plane leaves at 6 am, so I have to be there at least by 5am which means I have to leave here by 4am and be ready before that. I don’t know why I can’t make a call to a taxi. I put it off all day. I even planned how I could walk there, although walking to the airport at 2am is not a good idea, or I thought I could walk fri nite and just stay up all night. It is about 4-5 mi away, which is not that bad, but II don’t know how much is highway. So

#1. On my plan is to get transportation to the airport and I will check in then. There is a woman in the lobby, so I will visualize talking to her and also I remembered that my visa card had some kind of service, I can check on line. I don’t understand why I get paralyzed. The harder I try , the more frozen I get.

2. I got my mom a digital picture frame for Christmas and I wanted to download photos for her. Well, here it is, Easter, and I still have not done it or read the instructions. My excuse always was “I don’t have time”. Well, what is my excuse now? I feel such self loathing and disgust. So that is #2 on my plan tomorrow.

#3 on my plan is to do some computer work and go to sleep early.

Thank you It feels good to get this insanity out of my head and not feel alone.

Because of this group, I had many positive experiences today, that I KNOW would not have happened had I not check in earlier. Thanks again.

Recycler CI 5:35pm EST

Hi Pro Buddies!

Before the gym this morning, I did 2 household chores. At the gym, I did my cardio, ab exercises, and stretches.

I got some projects accomplished at work. One thing I mis-understood, however it got done anyway. Lunchtime I went for a walk and also did an errand. At the end of the workday, I updated my project list, and highlighted some easy projects for in the morning ;)

At home, I've fixed & eaten dinner, and started a load of clothes in the washer. Next I need to write emails to 2 friends before going to a volunteer meeting tonight. Maybe I will also putter around a little before the meeting? We'll see ;)

Have a great night! :)



Thank you, gals & guys, for being here! :)

isabo ci 1257pm

I am really happy with how this last week has gone for me.  My p-switch has been turned off, and I have been very productive, which has led to even moods with me, happy children, good suppers on the table, and lots of hubby time.  I am grateful this time, and will remember it in times that the darn p-switch is on.

Thinking about my unnatural obsessions has led to an AHA moment....while obsessing, it is impossible to grow, learn, progress.  It was a great tool for resistance, negative thinking, and it took my life over for over a close to two decades.

I am grateful for this site, to all of you fellow procrastinators.  Thank you for being here.


Nothing is worth more than this day  - Goethe

Several things to get done today...

I won't bore you with posting my "daily routine" every day. 

I have financial and filing items to take care of today - taxes, letter replies to old letters from creditors, etc. Finances is another area I have problems with. 

I saw some flagged emails in my inbox this morning where I've missed out/been denied because I did not answer previous emails.  Another recurring problem. 

and I am a week plus overdue in answering some forum posts - said that day that "I'll get right back to you" and haven't yet... 

Stay warm and dry today! 


Gentlemen, I believe we have much to discuss.
(Robert Lansing as Control, The Equalizer, Trial by Ordeal.)


grateful have found a place to write and share.  comforted to know i am not alone. 

succeeded in working well the past few days... only to have a discouraging coaching session.  instead of avoiding work, i will be gentle with myself and keep going.  i will allow myself to go to the swimming pool to exercise and relax and do a bit more work.  i am grateful too to have taken care of some admin things that were piling up.  thanks everyone. 

new to procrastinators anonymous,



Hi Sarito,

Thank you for joining and keep coming back. I hated myself so much when I found (by the Grace of God) PA that every time I logged on, I was sure I would be spammed out.

Instead I found hope and support, and remarkably people that did the same things I did! I was not olone!

There is something working at this site that I don’t understand. and that is ok, all I know is something is working here that did not work anywhere else for me. It takes awhile to figure out these posts, etc. but just keep coming back

Thank you!  I am feeling

Thank you!  I am feeling hopeful today.


I am so grateful for this site.Yesterday was not too bad only because of the support I found here. I got out only because of some encouraging words from a pro buddy. I am not doing anything exciting but, I am not shut down , paralyzed, hiding, eating and sabotaging and  feeling hopeless. Thank you all.

Soon I will be going home and I dread facing my unhealthy family situation. My stomach gets tight if I think about it. This was a first step changing what I "could "and when I get back I hope I have the courage and wisdom to not procratinate on finding more changes with the help of my HP and PA.

However, today I plan: 1. Stay in today 2. Think positive thoughts and DO NOT SHUT DOWN OR SABOTAGE BY AVOIDING LIFE and hiding in my room 3. Journal 4. Go to the library meeting at 1PM 5. Walk and pray 5. Write gratitude list:

1st gratitude I would like to share here (hope it is ok)

The first time I read the poem below was in the very location I am today- way over 30 years ago, before any of my recovery programs. Yet it had such an impact on me. Only with my 12 step programs, the people in in, and my HP do I have a a remote chance at any kind of life- such as it is and such as it is not. And for that I am grateful. Thank you all for being here.

Desiderata" (Latin for "desired things", plural of desideratum) is an inspirational prose poem about attaining happiness in life. ,

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly, and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexatious to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love, for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore, be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

by Max Ehrmann


Those of us who are aging hippies love that poem!  Does anyone remember the song by Les Crane circa 1971?  I'm SO dating myself lol.   

There is a proper balance between not asking enough of oneself and asking or expecting too much.  - May Sarton

Journey 9 am Step 2

 Step 2.  Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. 

You know, I say these words a lot and I think I believe them, but lately I've been seeing some really interesting coincidences that strengthen my faith that this HP stuff really does work.  Here's to coinkydinks!

Have a 9:30 meeting that I need to prepare for asap, then todo list and chatbox.   I was SO busy yesterday that I never even had time to do a todo list.  The good thing about that is that I put in a hard day's work without a thought of procrastination, the bad news is that I was disorganized and reactive.   I'm hoping to have a smoother and better planned day today.


There is a proper balance between not asking enough of oneself and asking or expecting too much.  - May Sarton

By Gods Grace todays CI


Word and prayer for the day: Psalm 119:114, Hebrews 10:23

You are my refuge and my shield; I have put my hope in your word.Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful.

God does not just want to give you strength - He wants to be your strength! Joyce Meyer 

Soundtrack of my day: Joyce Meyer /Bible teaching, Third Day  

My to do list: 

Read Bible/Pray

dd school early

jobA proof, email

bday invitations – finish!!

jobK proof, forms  (fri)

email job1 revisions, (fri)

update forms, new clients A, C, M emails (started, finish fri)

order supplies job1, f,p,n

pd pickup 2p, dd school 2,30p ther, 3.45

Clear email/inbox for day 

job 2 continue tools:

kromer 8:20 CI

A bit of a late start this morning (I'd like to CI by 8:00), but not bad.

Scheduled today:
*Class 11-12
*Dr's appt. 12-1:30
*Maundy Thurs. service 5:30-8:30

A good chunk of today is non-academic work:
*Church stuff (email KS, email out notes, buy stationery, go through mini-parish list) (*)
*Laundry (started)

Also want to get some academic work done
*Student seminar stuff (*)
*MoD summary (*)
*Read paper (started)
*Document 2 code files
*Figure out how to do secondary struct. uploads (*)
*Practice presentation

Right now, I'm going to practice my presentation, take care of student seminar stuff, start laundry, take care of church stuff. 

kromer 3 CI

I had a pretty productive morning, then just spaced out for almost an in lab getting back on track.

In my post above, I've starred the things I want to work on next. First student seminar email, then church stuff, then figure out how to do secondary struct uploads, then write MoD summary. Heading to chatbox now. 

Update 4:10 done w/ student seminar and church stuff, now figuring out how to do secondary structure uploads. 

Update 5:30 figured out how to do 2. struct uploads, made some progress on MoD summary, now heading to Maundy Thurs service. 

OMG.  My brain feels a

OMG.  My brain feels a little hijacked.  I was just looking through pictures of Winnie Cooper (whom I never could stand), reading about Danica and...reading about Memento, and how the Nolan brothers conceived of the plot, for an HOUR.  :(


I was already up late, b/c I decided to watch Memento. I hope that joining Netflix, just to give myself a relaxation now and then was not a bad idea.  In any case, I still need to go in and perform my leave of absense.  I think I'm trying to insulate myself from pain.  I feel a little bit effed up in the head.  My romantic delusions.  My pity parties.  Something doesn't happen right when I experience those.  It's like an unnatural obsession.   But I bring it up in this context, because it is a symptom of this addiction.  My obsessions are ways I have used to cope with needing to avoid-  I hardly even have a concept of being in a relationship with someone that is not shrouded in the concept of my avoidance addiction.   But back to things related distinctly to pro...I am going to make a list of things I do not like about my life tomorrow.  I will then proceed to read that paper that my professor gave me.  I will meet with someone or call the department on the phone.  I just want to thank everyone here for their support.

unnatural obsessions

This is so familiar!   Any kind of relationship, actually non-relationships, I had I absolutely obsessed over, thinking about him, what I should have done or said.  I spent years in that cycle, never progressing.  I had the lowest self esteem, no self confidence.  I called myself a born again virgin because there were literally years inbetween experiences.  I have absolutely no idea why my husband stuck around when we first starting seeing eachother.  I know at the time I was obsessing over a beloved pet who was dying....

anyway, for me, its calming to see that obessive traits isn't just my curse.

thank you for sharing


Nothing is worth more than this day  - Goethe

Falcon CI Thurs.

Good morning!  Sorry for the hasty thread-starter.  For some reason I was having trouble with the rich-text thingy this morning & couldn't change the font.

I have some tiresome stuff to do today, including having a probably stressful conversation with someone from another department.  But once I get through today, I have a long weekend.  Yay!



The threadstarter is great!  You know I have good intentions of making one for the next day sometimes but I never remember! 


There is a proper balance between not asking enough of oneself and asking or expecting too much.  - May Sarton