Procrastinators Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from chronic procrastination.

Wednesday 25 June 2008

Grail - 4.10pm CI, Thursday

Ok, maybe this will help...

I need to do 4 units before I go home.

Once I do that - I can go HOME! 


(Focusing takes such effort... why can't I just google aimlessly, endlessly?  Looking up 'mandelbrot broccoli', 'orange peel frog', 'how many shots in a bottle', 'rockclimbing shoes puncture repair', 'postmodernism', all seem so much more worthwhile... espcially the broccoli. :P )

'mandelbrot broccoli'

You guys are cracking me up this morning.  You know I have to google that now. 

The internet is a blessing and a curse to those of us who are easily distracted.  It's so tempting to "research" any idea that happens to enter my consciousness!  I blocked Wikipedia on my work computer because I couldn't stay away from it lol.


"The sooner you get behind, the longer you have to catch up." - Steven Wright

was pretty cool

I like the mandelbrot broccoli...ok, back to work now.

check in - evening

Well, thank you for the pat on the back. It is amazing what a
little bit of encouragement does for a person, now I have to remember
to give some back. And as far as working on the have-tos, well with
a little bit of thought, I know what they are, but if I didn't write
out like this, for some reason I drift, I need a lot of structure
around cleaning, in fact around anything around my home. I had a lot
of neglect, and some abuse as a kid and I think that I kind of
without really realizing this have used getting up or stuck in my
head as just a place where I go and it is kind of unconscious. I
happens mostly at home, not so much at work well that is because I
have conditioned myself to not do it at work, it used to happen at
work too. So I probably need to use one of those timers and set it
for like 15 minute intervals so that I don't drift too far I also
have ADD. I tend also to get nervous or anxious about the moving,
and it really isn't so much about the move or anything like that, in
fact I kind of think of it as a adventure, it is more like a fear
that I when I get into my new place that I won't have my routine, and
I won't be able to find things, and that because I will be living
with a friend for a couple of months, I guess I fear that we will get
on each other's nerves. This has happened to me in the past, but
that was in the past this is now. I guess I get kind of negative in
these type of moving situations, and I am a very positive person
actually. I also tend to get this anxiety around traveling too. So
maybe something about leaving my comfort zone. I guess. So, I don't
want to be like that, I want to be my fun loving self, and not get
uptight at people. That is no fun. :) Then, I feel guilty, and
then I feel like I have to make amends and all of this stuff. So, I
would like to get rid of the anxiety on the front end, and let God
show me the way, in fact give the anxiety to God and believe that God
will always take care of me, even when moving or traveling.

I am tired today, and I see my five year old son is, he fell asleep
on the way home from the YMCA, he goes to the Y during the day for a
program that they have. So, I am still making supper, I don't know
if I should wake him or not. I really think he needs the sleep, and
he did have a bag of chips on the way home, not exactly supper but
might be ok, it isn't something we do very often but I think every
once in a while is probably ok. So, I guess I am trying to
determine what I need to do before I go to bed here as far as packing
stuff. I could pack clothes, that would be a good goal. I still
feel like I am going to run out of time to pack and clean everything
though. :) Wow, I never realized that I had so much angst about
doing this kind of stuff until I started typing here, this is really
very therapeutic. I am learning a lot by doing this. Kind of like
journaling. I guess what would be the worst thing that could happen
here, that I would run out of time, the place would be a pig stye on
Monday when I move out, and I wouldn't have all my things packed and
ready to go, and the uhaul that I ordered wouldn't be available, and
I wouldn't be ready to move out on Monday at noon. Ok, so if that
happens, then what? Well, I guess I might lose my $300 security
deposit, and they might charge me for another day. And the person
that is moving in would have to wait a day, and would probably be
upset with me, as well as the people helping her move. But that
would be about it, I wouldn't die. Life would go on, and that would
be the worst case scenario, the very worst. Well, the worst would be
that I die while moving, but then that would be ok, because then I
would get to go to heaven. I would feel bad for my son, though. I
don't think that will happen. So really there is nothing to worry
about, and really if I want to worry - I could put it off for 24
hours and decide at that time if I would like to worry or not. :)
So anyway, that is my story, and my plan for tonight. Thank you all
for reading my story.

Recycler CI 7:30pm EST


Feeling a little more energy than usual now; not sure why, but grateful :)

Today: walked, stretched, work, errand at lunchtime, completed draft of newsletter, somewhat more stabilized today on a Waiting Situation, rode train home, cooked & ate dinner, took out trash, washed 2 loads of clothes, checked in with Internet groups ;)

Tonight: dry, fold & hang up 2 loads of clothes, wash & moisturize face, brush & floss teeth. See if have enough energy to do 1 more thing (anything lol! ;) around the house. Read recovery literature. Go to bed on time :)

Have a great night, everyone! :)


Thank you, gals & guys, for being here! :)


Wow, am I in demand resistance mode. I can't focus or prioritize. Lots of fear is keeping me cloudy.

But I will say, I have success when I can post my victory log. And take the time to tell myself "well done." vs. worrying about something else right away.

I'm proud that when a vendor kept dodging me, I went to their workplace and asked to speak with the manager and moved the ball forward. Then followed up with my client via email. I dreaded the confrontation, but things went smoothly and I'm seen as a follow through person with my client.

Here's what I need to do that I've been putting off:
- * Open my letters from the IRS and get back with them immediately *
- * Create a spending/saving plan *
- * Find a full-time job with benefits*

Meanwhile, to pay for my back taxes and wedding, I need to make money immediately. I will:
- contact my old teambuilding clients about doing a training session
- teach a summer class

I"ve been putting off job hunting for months while I temp. And this ain't cutting it. I realize that I've only sent out 5 resumes. No wonder!

Broken down into baby steps, this entails that I:
- Get clear/ Decide what job I want
- Drop my pride/worrying about what people think and Contact my clients and friends and begin asking for introductions to a job like that
- Create a kick ass, focused resume
- Join networking groups and meet people

Here's how I will invest in my dreams and building confidence: (This is the part I have forgotten)
- I will write a 6 month plan/ my dreams/ make a dream collage, xerox it and send it to all my friends. Then have them hold me to it.
- I will post affirmations on my mirror and in my wallet
- I will make a motivational CD (affirmations) to listen to while I drive and before I go to bed
- I will keep a victory log every day.

THere it is! Now, to work through this fear and join the game of life!!!


lucy's irs letters

"Open my letters from the IRS " 

 Oh, man, I've been there!  And many of us on this forum have issues around taxes. 

I highly recommend the Total Money Makeover from  He doesn't call it the IRS anymore, he calls it the KGB lol.  But this program has really helped me get my mind around financial matters, budgeting, debt, etc.

Have fun with that IRS stuff!



"The sooner you get behind, the longer you have to catch up." - Steven Wright

Good luck to you, Lucy! :)

Hi Lucy!

Thanks for checking in, and good luck to you! :)


Thank you, gals & guys, for being here! :)

Sunflower at 10:15

Need to:

Clean apartment
Get groceries
Type out minutes
Edit for friend
Email friend
Start report

Lark at 10:12 am

I haven't checked in for a day or so, and I'm running behind this morning. Rain later today, so outside chores are first. It's hard to be specific on what to plan (which isn't really good), so I'm going to start doing stuf and see how it goes. I'll check in later today and see how it went. Take care.

Lark at 5:03pm 1:49am

Despite my non-specific post, today went okay, though there are several things to do and a few to make better. I hope you all did okay today.
To do:
(X)finish section of project A and put aside
(X)sweep workshop
put things away in shop for fifteen minutes
edges of kitchen walls
(X)finish first section of project B
(X)do first step of project C, get it ready for tomorrow
(X)check in later tonight

Journey 9:15

Back to work today!  I had a good day yesterday but I did spend too much time goofing around on the computer as usual.  I made two of the four phone calls that I had planned to make, so I want to make those last two calls today, and now I need to add one more to the list - so three phone calls today.  One is just to reschedule a dental appointment, so I don't know why that is so hard to face.  Maybe I'll try to get that one out of the way first thing this morning. 

I also did not check on the progress of financial aid for my daughter's college, which is crucial for this fall.  I will do that today without fail!   

My laundry is all caught up, and I got rid of the mini-pile that I was growing on my desk at home.  I still have a pile aka personal folder here at the office that I'm gradually going through, and I'm not adding to it anymore thanks to you guys!  It's hard to face all that financial and legal caca but it's really easier and less stressful once one has faced the hard facts.  Why did it take me 50 years to figure that out lol??


"The sooner you get behind, the longer you have to catch up." - Steven Wright

Journey 2:00 pm

Glad I checked on the financial aid stuff, i thought I was already late sending it in, but the deadline is July 1. I also have 3 more forms to send in.  So maybe it will all be ok!  I'll finish it up today before I leave the office.  DD is cooking dinner, so I don't have to rush home.  *whew* dodged a bullet on that one. 

Also got a break on phone call #2, he wasn't there so I left a voice mail! 

Now, I can work on my favorite project for a couple of hours! 


"The sooner you get behind, the longer you have to catch up." - Steven Wright

Journey 1 pm

Finally made one of those phone calls!  I did the hardest one first, but I indulged in some serious avoidance behavior before I finally did it.  Giving myself a little reward and going to read my favorite blog for 10 minutes, then check back here so I don't get carried away.


"The sooner you get behind, the longer you have to catch up." - Steven Wright

gratz journey!

phone calls are hard, good job making it (and putting the hardest first no less).


journey 1:25 thanks kromer!

 Break over, back to work!

"The sooner you get behind, the longer you have to catch up." - Steven Wright

kromer 8:50 CI

After sending email to my advisor last night, I'm scared to go to work this morning (or even to check my email :blush: --as of 8:30, he hadn't gotten back to me)

I'm going to:
*Tidy my room (Done)
*Make a schedule for non-work stuff I want to accomplish this week (Done)
*Quickly update, print out my resume (Updating done)
*Make lunch
*Get to work by 9:45

Then I'm going to let myself leave work at 5:30, so I can go to church cookout.

Updates every time a complete one of these, check in again when I get to lab.

kromer 10:25

Got to work about 15 min late, printed resume, checked email, then spend the last 20 min webflipping/freaking out about talking to my advisor.

He wants to talk with me this morning, so I'm going to read over the email I sent him yesterday, listen to a calming song on my ipod, and then go see if he's around. I'll check in again after meeting with a plan on what to do next.

Thanks for all your support!

Update 10:45: He's busy right now. I'm going to take care of a small task (Matlab licenses), spend 10 min answering WM emails, and then check if he's free.  

kromer 12 CI yay!

Met with advisor, it's all OK, I get to stick with my old project.

Emailed friends and family who listened to me panic yesterday, to say thanks.

Took a 30 min lunch break.

Now I'm going to take notes from the meeting, finish answering WM emails, email CH and AK to say I'm not switching projects, and make out a schedule of what I want to get done this week.  

kromer 1:25 CI

Did all of the above. Now I have a plan for the week!

I need to go to a payroll orientation at 3, will come back to lab after that is done, and then plan to leave for church at 5:30.  

 Here's what I want to get done in my remaining time at work:
MIT (will take most of the rest of the day): clustering coregulators
Small tasks: Find bg reading, email SM

I'll start by emailing SM (takes 2 min), then I'll start on my MIT, step by step.

First steps for clustering coregulators (I hope to get all these steps done by 5:30, but I'm not sure I can):
1)Look up message-passing algorithm, decide if it makes more sense to use that or kmeans clustering, if it makes sense to use message passing then implement
2)Do clustering with a simple, fairly stupid distance metric
3)Write code that lets me visualize clusters in Cytoscape (w/ real names)

I'll also be sure to talk to CH sometime before 3. If she doesn't have useful suggestions, I'll email EYL and LR. I'll also do a quick library search and look at DK's webpage for more bg reading suggestions.  

kromer 5:50 CI

MIT: I got through the first 2 steps and took a stab at the 3rd, but the code for visualization is still buggy.  

Small tasks: I emailed SM.
I didn't talk to CH (grr to me!), but I did just send her an email. I did the library search and looked at DK's webpage

Tasks for the evening:
*Go to church cook-out (next, yay!)
*Call IA MIT
*Find sat curve and house jobs papers MIT
*Fix buggy visualization code MIT
*Work on organizing sat curve data
*Email PT about possible research rotation
*Email about recipe
*Sort Bio books

When I get home from cook-out (around 8:30), I'll start by called IA. then try and find the sat curve and house jobs papers. Then I'll check back in.  



kromer 10:10 CI

I biked to and from church cook out, called IA, and found missing papers. I also talked to my future roommate about housing (productive) and spent an hour freaking out about housing (not productive at all). I need to come up with a plan for dealing with housing, but that can wait until later this week.

Next, I'm going to:
*Email about recipe
*Fix buggy code
*Check in again


you are doing great: remember to breathe.  

Hey Kromer

I just now read your updates from yesterday . . . you wrote "realized that my advisor had essentially asked me to switch to a new project for my last seven weeks of work"

Wow, that could have been quite a setback!  That's enough to throw the recovering procrastinator right into a tailspin!  But not you, oh no, you called someone for help and support and you're jumping right back on the horse.  I'm so impressed.  :D


"The sooner you get behind, the longer you have to catch up." - Steven Wright

scarlett CI 8:30 am EDT

Hey, y'all. I forgot to take my meds yesterday, proving once again that I need to use my daily rituals to keep me on track.

Ta da:
Listen to voicemail
Check schedule

To do:
Eat breakfast
Take pills
Do dishes
Send out licenses *MIT*
Update master to-do list

The adrenaline you've been living on only leaves you wanting.

scarlett CI 4:30 pm EDT

Better today than yesterday, but still moving really slowly. I just looked at a to-do list from over a month ago, and the realization that I hadn't done most of it sent me spiraling down.


Ta da:
Listen to voicemail
Check schedule
Take pills
Do dishes
Eat breakfast
Send out licenses *MIT*
Call LR re: plan

To do:
Get DS plan *MIT* (started)
Update master to-do list (started)
Resched mtg w/ MS/AJ/RL/BT

The adrenaline you've been living on only leaves you wanting.

G - Wednesday CI

I've had a half day today, and I've already been here... a couple of hours??
So I'm just doing the CI to get things out of the way:

Project SB
1/7 units complete
3/7 complete
4 to go...

G - Weds, CO

Was part-way through the next two, when my sister called from A&E (accident & emergency), and I had to go pick up my 1.5yr old nephew.

Sis is ok, minded him for the evening and got him off to preschool this morning.
Well, I've been wanting to spend more time with my nephew... !?

e's Wednesday

Good morning! This morning has been an effective day already: I sorted out the clothes to keep from the clothes to mend/tailor from the clothes to ship home. I feel like the end is in sight, even if it isn't!

This morning: go to the bank to change addresses and start new bank account. Remember to not eat veggies, fruits, dairy or legumes today (which is mostly what I eat!) Breakfast was a bunch of cashews and some bread and water. This is going to get dull fast. My son has suggested that I eat chocolate for the rest of the day, but I will get nothing done except to fall asleep if I do.

Goal: find A's #$%& taftotita!

Today is a chatbox day again: even if I am not consistent, it definately moves me along.

Have a great day, everyone!

Convalaria - first check-in

 Hi My name is Convalaria and I am new.
I have procrastinated all my life.
Today I am at home trying to do work related stuff I should have finished 4 weeks ago.
I hope that no one minds me starting the daily checkin but it is 12.25 pm where I live.
Today I have:

  • made a few necessary phone calls
  • medicated
  • picked up doggy dos in the back yard
  • worked on schoolstuff for 2 hours
  • eaten brekfast and drunk coffee
  • read and posted at various forums

I need to:

  • shower and get dressed
  • have lunch
  • continue working for another 2 hours
  • make a phonecall
  • report back

I hope to get to know you all, to learn from you and to contribute

joining in welcome to Convalaria :)


Welcome, Convalaria! We're glad you are here! Keep coming back! :)


Thank you, gals & guys, for being here! :)

Welcome Convalaria!

Good job on jumping right in there and participating in the forum.  We've all been there so there's no judgement here, just support!  Take care.


"The sooner you get behind, the longer you have to catch up." - Steven Wright

welcome Convalia

It is great to see you here and a wonderful thing for you to start the check in! Suggestion: start the check in as a general message and then add your personal check in as a new comment afterwards: it will help you track responses later on in the day. (I did the same thing myself the first time!)

You have stumbled on a great place of support: read the check ins, try working in the chatbox, and check out the Sunday Procrastinators Anonymous meeting to see if it fits for you. I have found that thiss a great site to begin the process of forgiving myself for procrastinating and, one task at a time, begin to change my behavior.

hugs, e

P.S. congratulations on having picked up the dog do!

I fixed up today's thread starter

e wrote:

It is great to see you here and a wonderful thing for you to start the check in! Suggestion: start the check in as a general message and then add your personal check in as a new comment afterwards: it will help you track responses later on in the day. (I did the same thing myself the first time!)

Yes, thanks for adding the note. I fixed this up. I'm not sure it's explained on the site anywhere. I should add that.

Procrastination is the grave in which opportunity is buried.

Reporting Back

 8.22 pm

Did not do any more work related stuff Cry
walked the dog
cooked dinner
tidied lounge
surfed the net

Convalaria - be gentle with yourself!

Try not to beat yourself up. I've found that only makes matters worse.

Procrastinators tend to be perfectionists. Try to give yourself credit for what you did do, rather than focusing only one what you didn't do.

And keep checking in! :)

Procrastination is the grave in which opportunity is buried.

Still trying to cover my tracks

Hi All and thank you for the welcome.
I am not sure what I have to do to start a thread.
I will continue in the Wednesday thread even though it is 7.45 am on Thursday here.
I am in a situation where my procrastination has me unable to face work. I am manipulating and buying time so that I can cover up the things that I did not do in a a timely manner.
The work I do is difficult and with out boundaries but I make it worse by not engaging in it and by leaving tasks undone at various levels. My procrastination has had some unplesant consequences......but I still persist in procrastinating!
:( :sad:

I would like to live with greater integrity.
Today I have to:

  • organise stuff and send an email regarding this stuff
  • fix on line work related materials
  • make doctors appointment and visit
  • look after dog by walking him, picking up dos and getting bones
  • attack work related pile 25 pieces
  • shower, dress, medicate, teeth, breakfast
  • check in when done.

It is now 12.01 and I have done none of the stuff that I am home for.
I have however, spent  over 90 mnutes with an occupational therapist who is modifying my mother's house before she returns home froom the hospital. This was important and I was glad to be home for this....
Also had lunch and made 2 calls.

A lot of the work related stuff I see as somehow not really meaning full....and also somehow I feel out of control and not able to do it well ......but then that is only an excuse as I have this problem with things that are important and meanigful

What Now??
try to do some of the on line stuff!!


I can relate exactly to what you are going through.  After a couple of good weeks, I have had three days where I got maybe four hours of work done.  All you can do is try day by day. 

Thank you Kanzeon!

It is good to know that I am not alone and that others understand the paralysis.

hello Convalaria and welcome!

Nice to have you here!

Sometimes all I can do are babysteps.  Like make some space on the table or desk, and grab one chunk of the Intimidating Paperwork ... and just touch it, then put it back in the box.   A few hours later, I read half a page, then put it back in the box.   Maybe later, I can actually respond to or write on part of one page.  But this only works if I tell myself I am just doing "this tiny bit" right now.

It doesn't work if I actually think about all that I have to do!  So I don't think about it.  I just focus on a few minutes of Intimidating Project, and then allow myself to take a break.

This may sound silly, but I actually work through my fears of Intimidating Paperwork this way.  And I get little chunks of work done. And it adds up.

I have found this to be far more effective than my other usual approach, which was to sit on the couch and cry.


lol moving


"I have found this to be far more effective than my other usual approach, which was to sit on the couch and cry."

The kernel of truth in this statement makes it even funnier.  Thanks for starting off my day with a smile!



Thank you moving along

it is nice to meet you here. My paper work is urgent and there is a lot of it. Baby steps may work for me when there is some time before the deadline.

I am trying ?? to get enough done to get me by and with luck I can start fresh in a couple of weeks.  So far no success.....

I have looked at this site and there is a lot of useful information and strategies.  I am hoping try again if I can get past this crisis.


I identify with feeling overwhelmed with paperwork and missing deadlines: however, I do find that it is when I HAVE to get things done that I am the most deadlocked. Movingalong had told me some time ago about microbursts, which s/he describes here as little glancers, actions in the right direction. When I have used this technique, ie, set the timer for 5 minutes towards looking at a project, I often find that once I have started, I am much more willing to continue on. When I hit a wall of anxiety I stand up, walk around for a minute or two, then come right back to it.

There is a downloadable tool called Instant Boss which works extremely well. It will time you for 10 minute work periods and then give you a 2 minute break before getting you back on track. It works remarkably well for me as I can adjust the work time and break time amounts, especially as I have found that I work well for about 14 minutes and then need a 5 minute break,

Don't worry about the posting: the way I do it is to chose a forum topic, ie, daily check in, like you did yesterday. The title I give is the day and date. The blurb in the middle is whatever I think up, ie, Have a Nice Day, or some other pithy comment. If I have the time and the inclination I will chose a graphic from the graphics for forum and insert it using the rich text module. (see the instructions under "graphics for forum posts". Once I have created the thread starter I then do my own check in, just like you have. Don't sweat it, it takes a little practice to figure all of this out! :)