Friday 30 March 2007

Well, I'm not sure I can actually handle the bookending.... I described my fear of lists elsewhere..... 

But I am seeing that admitting our problems is healthy....  So in the interests of full-disclosure, I found this site something like 6 hours ago and I have been time-bingeing reading and writing on it every since.

Now I am going to stop, even if all I do is eat crackers and watch television.

I read somewhere in here that we can only make one new habit every 30 days.  So I would like to propose that my new habit for the month of April is working on my time-bingeing:

1) 30 minutes to a task, even TV.  I own a VCR and there is no reason I can't watch TV in 30 minute increments

2) After every 30 minutes, check in break: I will write down what I did.  I will eat, drink, sleep, or perform any other bodily function that I have been neglecting.

3) I will take at least 1 break and do at least 1 DIFFERENT 30 minute task before giving another 30 minutes to a previous task

4) I get exceptions for sleep, class (my classes run 1.5 hours), group meetings, and social events (yes, sometimes I time-binge on social events, but that's only when I'm enjoying myself - and I think it is worth separating enjoying myself from distracting myself - if only I could spend 24 hours a day enjoying myself instead of being numb!)  I will take a break after every 1 hour of group meeting.  I will make clear to my group members that I need a break every hour.  I will try to institutionalize hourly breaks as part of our group meetings.  I will say something like, "Guys, we've been doing this for an hour.  I find it helps my productivity to take a break every hour.  I'm going to take a break for ten minutes.  Would you like to join me?"  Even if I can't muster the strength to say anything, I'm still going to take a break every hour.  Heck, my group members can't possibly look down on me more for unannounced breaks than they do for me never having anything ready when I said I would. 

5) It is okay if I screw up now and again.  The important thing is to keep going.

6) I am not afraid of this list.  I am not afraid of this list.  This list is my friend.  This list will help me be a happier person.  I love this list.  I will print out this list and kiss it at least once a day..... or something! 

Damn it, I'm already afraid of this list.  Help!  I AM going to try printing it out and kissing it.  Right now.

Today's to do list:

* Finish music/video list for class 1
* Balance checkbook
* Go through library, pick up books for class 2
* Choose readings for class 2
* Finish syllabus for 183, post to we
* Drop off class 2 reader master to copy shop
* Pay bills

Already well into task 1, because it's so much fun--but haven't meditated, and it's late morning already.

Perhaps that's the first task!

I've always made schedules in the past, but somehow, never seem to get the tasks finished (most of the time). I just HOPE I can at least finish all of these things as it is already a light to-do list.

- Art history paper
- Watch & critique the movie "Marie Antoinette"
- Study for art history final
- Call father about doctor's appointment
- Call doctor about appointment
- at least 90 minutes of preparation for the calculus test

Side Things (slightly for fun)

- fan art description
- time sorting

---------

"Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power."