So confused about how to use the site... :(
Who knows if this will be seen by anyone... I'm not sure where people actually go to talk to one another. So, I figured I'd just start a forum topic and see if anyone answers.
I'm working on a paper for school, which is the final paper required to wrap up the last of my incomplete courses. I had to take this past semester off because my procrastination was so out of control that I couldn't finish my classes the previous semester, and it's taken me 6 months to finally wrap up 2 of them, and the last one still has this last paper outstanding.
It's supposed to be in... well, last night, and before that on friday, and before that 2 weeks ago. I've gotten one extension after another, and this time I said that if I didn't have it finished by sunday night I'd just hand in whatever I had. Of course, on sunday night I had nothing.
I've been up all night and have finally gotten SOMETHING started, but I am so desperate for moral support. I'm lonely and overwhelmed and I just feel like every fiber of my being says NO, I can't write it. I just can't do it.
I want to finish. But something in me is refusing to move forward on this. I can't understand what the resistance is about.
Maybe it's not important to understand. Maybe I need to suck it up and all that, but I don't know HOW to suck it up. If I knew how, I would. I don't know why I'm doing this to myself.
If anyone reads this, can you please say a prayer for me. I feel like I'm throwing away my chance at getting back into school, and at 36 I can't afford to throw my life away AGAIN. Starting over, and over, and over and over... it's just not going to work very much longer. I can't keep showing up with no explanation for why my life is a mess and I'm starting from scratch. I need to finish this time. Please pray. I'm serious. I know it seems like it's not a big deal, but I need some kind of help.