How and why check-ins work...
Checking in (or "book-ending") means doing this:
- Post a message committing to do a specific task during a specified period of time.
- At the end of that period of time, post a message reporting on what you did.
This sounds simple-minded, but it's a surprisingly effective tool. It works for several reasons:
- It makes you accountable.
- It provides social support. People can cheer you on when you succeed, or encourage you try again when you don't. Plus it ameliorates the sense of loneliness and isolation that people can feel doing certain tasks, making them easier to do.
- By anonymous (not verified) at 8 Dec 2005 - 2:51pm
- Daily Check-ins
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testing
testing out how to use daily check in Thank you for your support
laundry - oops
Put away all laundry for today.oops - wrong place... can't delete???
mechanics of checking in
This comment has been moved here.
thanks sorry for doing it wrong
"The wind is mightiest when it whirls"
Why support groups may help procrastinators
I just read this on the Yahoo Group The Now Habit that flexiblefine told us about (I hope no-one minds me quoting from another site). I think it answers part of the reason why I've had so much success in addressing procrastination this year - this is the first time I've actively sought support (via the internet in my case). It also addresses lonliness issues.
> Just thought I'd point you in the direction of a rather good Podcast from
> "The Cranky Middle Manager Show" featuring a guy called Mark Goulston.
>
http://cmm.thepodcastnetwork.com/2006/01/08/the-cranky-middle-manager-show-30-ma\
rk-goulston-getting-out-of-your-own-way/
>
I did finally listen to the podcast. For those delaying, it's a
little over 30 minutes, and most of it is the interview with Dr.
Goulston. Procrastination is one of the topics he covers in his book,
"Get Out of Your Own Way at Work." The book is about conquering
various types of self-defeating behavior, not only procrastination.
He mentions an interesting angle on procrastination -- that we may
procrastinate because of loneliness. Being the only one responsible
for something can make us feel lonely, and we're more likely to
succeed if we enlist others to help. He even suggests that Alcoholics
Anonymous succeeds because of the fellowship at least as much as
because of the 12-step program. AA members don't have to feel alone
-- when they have problems, they always have someone to call and help
them get through it.
Could I just recommend CLAEast.org? Ck it out-everyone cks in w/
Pls ck out the CLA, group- It's useful I think to find some ck ins. Older crowd there but still it is active, going, every nite 8p-9:30p Phone meetings.
Then action meetings, check ins all night..
It takes time getting used to, but it is cool. if U understand the concept. .
Have a wonderful day all~! I'm new to this group. Let's show Inertia the door & march onward!?!!
Listening to it
Listening to it now.....very good
Values are what you do, not what you think. Ok. Confronting adversity in an effective way...a life that makes sense.
About "Get Out of Your Own Way at Work"
I bought the book after listening to the podcast, but I was surprised by the format of the book. Instead of dealing with a few broad topics that get in our way at work (like procrastination), the book addresses 40 topics.
For each topic, there are a few pages about the topic, including activities to help you become more aware of the problem and ways to get over it.
I enjoyed the book, but it isn't something I would recommend as a procrastination-stopper. As a more widely-applicable business-activity book, I think it's interesting. (Wait for a paperback edition to come out, in either case.)
--
flexiblefine
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/TheNowHabit/
Hi Normy. Nice chatting with
Hi Normy. Nice chatting with you yesterday.
This is certainly my problem. I am the only one. I am responsible for everything. I find myself getting angry at married women who have a husband helping out with thier shows, house work, errands, condflicts and bills who say to me, Just get off your butt! Whats wrong with you? Are you lazy? The truth is, although I am extreamly independent I cant do everything by myself.
During the times I have enough money to hire someone things do go better.
It ~is~ easier
Well, I've been alone, and I now live with DSO, and on the whole being with him ~is~ easier than going it alone. Having said that I've had SOs in the past who created a lot more problems than they solved.
please don't create duplicate day threads!!
Please check to see whether someone has already started a day thread before starting a new one!! Today I moved the messages to the new thread before deleting the old one, but it took a long time and I was very tempted to just delete it. Please don't give me this work. Check first!!
New members - please read the overview of how check-ins work:
http://www.procrastinators-anonymous.org/node/13
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Procrastination is the grave in which opportunity is buried.
sorry
sorry that was so much work for you, pro. I'm sure it was unintentional. Thanks for all the hard work you put in. You know you're really having an impact with this site.
check-ins are so...public
So the check-in idea sure seems like a good one. But i must confess i would feel uncomfortable "coming clean" to the world like that. Ie if it were to just these people who seem to be fellow strugglers, it would feel comfortable to me, even liberating, but knowing that anyone in the world could read it, makes me uncomfortable.
Of course, that's a bit hypocritical because i read these posts before i was a member (ie i was part of that public) and it helped me know what i was joining.
Any ideas?
check-ins are so...public
I had to laugh at your post...my feelings exactly! As soon as I learn what I can do next I will have to bite the bullet and liberate myself! lol So what if my future boss tracks me down! I want to take action and learn how to work with what I've got.
AA uses initials
I just remembered that in AA it's traditional to only identify people by their intials. Perhaps some people are already doing that; for example someone's user name here is 'e'. I suppose we could do that here. An invented username, however, might serve the same purpose.
W'ch y'all think?
Exactly - just do what you
Exactly - just do what you need to do in order to feel comfortable *enough* to actually do something.
There's no requirement to have your 'real name' as your username, and you'll see that most people don't.
for anonymity, be careful about the details
I'm careful about my anonymity here. I don't post any identifying details. I feel safe enough.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Procrastination is the grave in which opportunity is buried.
It's kind of public, but it
It's kind of public, but it could/can be kind of anonymous.
Would you feel more comfortable if you removed any identifying details from your profile and the check in posts?
Posting anonymously, etc.
For the most part, a very miniscule part of humanity will hit on this site. The best thing is to use a screen name that's unrelated to who you are or what you do, etc. Our chatbox can only be viewed by members, so we have a little more leeway. With posts, it's best not to mention specific names or places, because a Google search may (?) bring those up. Being a bit vague is probably the best thing to do. Some of us do communicate privately, so more specific info can be shared that way. On our profile page, we can accept or not accept e-mails. I think it may be "not accept" by default. If anyone needs to talk to a "person", that works fine. I'm always happy to hear from fellow members who need to vent, etc. Thanks
anonymous tasks for check-ins
Some people just list their tasks with a one-letter abbreviation:
Example:
Worked on Project A.
Phoned B.
Organized C.
If you think someone might recognize your post, use fake initials to label your task. If you need to phone John or Jane, don't say "Phone J." .... Instead, make up some unrelated initial that only you knows what it means.
thanks
then *I* wont remember which is which
Thanks for the advice. I still feel uncomfortable, even tho i see the wisdom in what you're saying. the people on this forum tend to be generous and helpful.
I would feel much more comfortable in the chatbox.
kindof
I know what it's like to figure things out from a few clues, so i assume that if a coworker or family member of mine happened upon this site, from the details in my post--especially check-in posts--they might be able to guess who i am. Or at least narrow down that i must be one of a set of people they know. And then they could ask those 10 unsuspecting people innocuous questions and narrow it down further. Those are the ideas that go thru my head.
But...would they really?Or
But...
would they really?
Or is it more that that's a way for you to not have to do it, or think about it, or try changing, or solve your problems?
I do do that, and it's that sort of thinking that ironically, makes me want to change.
The paranoia that other people will find out, the coming up with elaborate excuses to not change, or why this thing, technique, etc won't work, rather than actually trying it.
It's like, I wasn't so worried about the problem or behaviour itself, up until I realise that I'm *acting* like an alcoholic or someone with that kind of problem.
I try and snap myself out of it and go, hey, it's not that big a deal in the long run if I'm late and messy, and if it is, then I *do* need help, and people will understand that.
But that's just me.
Maybe remove your location and birthdate from your profile, if you want to give yourself a reason to go do it, and then just don't worry about?
I mean, without that, there's oh... several million people on the internet, of which you could be any?
Although I know those sorts of worries aren't entirely rational...
i see where you're going
i see where you're going with that and why. As you point out it might be the sense of my own vulnerability rather than the actual realistic chance of someone recognizing me. I mean, procrastination is not something i'm proud of, if ya know what i mean.
I really, really know.I
I really, really know.
I wasn't trying to deeply analyse you, or anything like that, if that makes sense, I wouldn't be so forward. I'm saying honestly that that is what *I* do, and questions I've been trying to ask myself.
But good luck.
Ummmm...I'm in New Zealand.
Ummmm...
I'm in New Zealand. Which means it's already 9.50am Thursday morning. (Everyone else is on the Wednesday thread).
I've never used the check in before (well, I only joined two days ago), so... any suggestions on how I should do it?
Should I just pretend it's yesterday, and post my comments to that thread?
o_O?
some check-in options
Anybody can start the thread for the new day.
You just go here:
http://www.procrastinators-anonymous.org/forum/6
Then look at top where it says:
. Check-ins or "Book-ending"
. My forum discussions.
. Active forum discussions.
. Post new forum topic.
Click on "post new forum topic" and label subject the day/date.
Write something simple like hello "Welcome to Thursday". Add a graphic if you feel like it.
That starts the thread.
Then reply to that new day's thread with a separate post with your own personal post for the day.
(Well, actually, it's explained much better below ... in pro's post "mechanics of checking in".)
Yup. pro says "Every day someone (whoever gets to the forum first) starts a thread for the day". That could be you, if you wish.
The most important thing is to not worry about being "perfect". People frequently accidentally post on the "wrong" day's thread, and it really doesn't matter.
What matters is that you are reaching out and connecting with others.
--- movingalong
Thank you for your
Thank you for your reply!
"Yup. pro says "Every day someone (whoever gets to the forum first) starts a thread for the day". That could be you, if you wish."
I think I realised if I did that, and I'm the only one this far this side of the dateline, it'd always be me, and so avoided thinking about that option.
And of course I'm just being a twit, and admitting that makes me look like a twit, but duh, that's the sort of thinking that has me procrastinating all the time.
So hopefully I can embarrasedly admit that I am that sort of twit here, because well... I can't anywhere else.
I'm reading posts and going - that's me! That's me! (Or worse).
I put so much effort into only being perceived as the least-organised person people know me know, rather than oh, letting people know how bad it actually gets. And yet sometimes things are such a comedy of errors I want to relate them, then realise it won't sound quite as funny to others, it'll be just over the line into terrible.
Anyway, posting a new thread is not a huge responsibility, and I don't have to, it's just if I want to, but I'll still avoid doing it for the moment because I think I'll get caught up looking for a picture or something.
Cheers. ;)